Awesome Equinox!

No, it’s really not that far….  Wee Gill, the Melodeon Master and I travelled to Scotland at the weekend to ‘do’ Equinox.  Well, why not?  We pitched up at the glorious Craufurdland Estate (as featured on Country House Rescue) in spectacular autumn sunshine after days of truly torrential rain.  And what does truly torrential rain mean?  MUD!!! 

With us both nursing slightly dodgy knees, we were here for a gentle jog round and we were so glad we didn’t go faster - what stunning scenery!  We had even planned so far as to put jelly babies in my vest pockets to treat ourselves on the way round.  On our 10k we went through bluebell woods, deep forest, tall trees (with nests at the top), marshy meadows, sheep, cows, and the very deepest of muddy trenches.  It was completely, totally, and utterly awesome.  Having started the day thinking ‘this is a one-off, it’s a long way, I’ll just be doing it the once’, after 3k I was trying to figure out how I could manage another trip to Scotland to do it again.

And we were so clean at the start! 

We had beautiful stripey T shirts (£2, thank you Sainsbury’s sale) and I’d made matching headbands - but as mine made me look like Widow Twankey, we sensibly abandoned them…

I’m clearly out of practice as I lost a shoe in the first (very polite) mud.  So we stopped whilst I pulled my laces as tight as I could - better cutting blood circulation off to the feet than losing a shoe, eh?  The course was described as ‘gently undulating’ (ooh, where have I heard that before), but in fact really was ‘gently undulating’ this time…  We were through marshy meadows, along a pretty river, up a steep bank, bit more marsh, beautiful spongey foresty and all in glorious blue skied sunshine.  There was a very Elegant Lady in Blue ahead of us - beautiful auburn hair, slim, tall, and looking sooooo dainty from behind.  How does she do that?  Then we could hear shrieks up ahead - and we were into our first gulley…

At the next one most people slid into the mud.  But there was a BRIDGE.  And what do you do off bridges?  Yep - JUMP!  So, encouraged by the gathering crowd, I did…

 

Awesome!  Ooh, but stinky…  The lovely Elegant Lady in Blue ahead of me said it was like wading in diarrhoea.  Not quite sure how she knew… but…  It was DEEP.  Wee Gill kept her arms aloft and stayed relatively clean.  I drowned the jelly babies and got spectacularly mucky.  Bliss!  As somebody behind us said ‘how come doing this makes me feel 6 years old again?’  SO true!  Loved it…

Wee Gill, however, is not quite so keen on the mud.  I think this was the point at which she said “You are SOOOOOO sacked’…  But I don’t think she meant it.  Or if she did does anyone out there need a PA???

We helped each other out when we got stuck and, even better than that, so did everybody else!  We were helped a LOT by the lovely chap in front of us who regularly waited for us and gave us a helping hand out of the slippy stuff or up the steepest hills.  Brilliant camaraderie!

And on through the woodland, pasture, gentle undulations and peacefully grazing sheep.  This had to be the prettiest run of all, with the most spectacular mud in all of its different forms.  At some point I said the mud was slippy, sloppy and sticky and we realised that they could be names of the 7 dwarves…  Ahead of me someone started singing ‘Hi Ho, Hi Ho, it’s off to work we go” so here, in honour of Equinox, we present Off White and the Seven Mudwarves:  Sloppy, Slippy, Sticky, Squelchy, Sploshy, Stinky and Glop… I think it might catch on!

At some point I picked up an abandoned piece of Mud Runner tape and wound it round my head.  Wee Gill said I looked like I’d ‘gone feral’.  YAY!

One of the fabulous marshalls told us we only had 1.5k to go but we could still hear shrieking ahead.  The others in our little group said it was just the finish line but, no, it was the very last patch of deep sticky mud… the lady in front of me got stuck and I asked if I could, um, give her a shove.  She said yes, so I shoved.  But as my legs were stuck, as I shoved her out, I just fell further and further into the mud and I was SO stuck… With the help of a handy tree I managed to haul myself out, gave Wee Gill a helping (muddy) paw and we were off.  Creature from the Black Lagoon or what?!

And then we were finished - through the line to our beautiful medals, goody bags (brill T shirts again) and a final pose for the cameras.

And I guess a BIG apology to the nearby motel where we stayed.  We did try to get the mud off before we returned - really, we did!

BIG thanks, as ever, to the fantastic Mud Runner team - the lovely marshalls, the fantastic staff and the ever present and ever patient Kes and Beth who keep everything going and make it all so much fun.

Yep, I’ll be doing it next year.  And Wee Gill, who reckons she’ll retire after achieving Mud Mistress status at the Classic in October, said ‘It Was Brilliant’.  And then, just a little bit later and after a shower… ‘I wouldn’t rule out doing it again’.

No pressure, but that’s in print now.  Am I still sacked?