Got-a-Sec?

Six Nations style training...

2012-02-05T18:33:00.003Z

Well, if it's good enough for the Wales Rugby team...

On Friday, in a very beautiful heavy frost, I did a hilly slippery 5k - not so much IceBreaker as AnkleBreaker so I went especially slowly - and I am in training for being last, don't forget!

Today was 'running up sand dunes at Merthyr Mawr' which is apparently what the Wales Rugby team do to get fit. I should have gone better prepared, rather than wearing heavy walking boots, thermal socks, 84 layers, a fleece, waterproof jacket, gloves and a woolly hat... It did start out as 'walking the dogs' so I was suitably dressed for that and the sub-zero conditions at least...

New Running Dog has recently developed a phobia of, um, twigs. Yes, twigs. As we live in the country in a wooded area, this is Not Good. We think it has something to do with a recent bout of stomach cramps that she had... She's now had every blood test and scan known to the vets to rule out anything physical and last weekend she had a visit from a doggy psychiatrist. Really - they exist! If she steps on a twig she freaks out, shakes with terror and won't move... We've carried her home once already....

Anyway, we figured Merthyr Mawr (home of the Christmas Pudding Race) would be a good place to walk as it's sand, not woods. Sand is Good Stuff, being soft and not shaped like twigs... We met Toby, a very handsome dalmation, who raced New Running Dog up and down the biggest dune, which is where I joined in. I think I got lapped three times... Rubbish Running Dog lay on her back in the sand and had her tummy tickled.

As New Running Dog was having such a fab time we walked a bit further, stepped on a twig and, well, came to a grinding halt. We tried cajoling, persuading, food, huge enthusiasm, everything... still Game Over.

So, just like the Wales Rugby team, I did weight training. I carried New Running Dog back to the car... I have, at least, found a way of carrying her comfortably...

And you'll notice that it's me doing the carrying... Guy says he's not in training for anything so he'd take the photo instead...

Running!

2012-01-29T17:34:00.002Z

Today I actually went running! Obviously that's 'running' in the sense that I call it running where Fit Mark calls it 'moving slower than a tectonic plate'. But, nevertheless, running is what it was.... Just 3k. Or it might only have been 2.5k... I wasn't wearing my clever watch thingy as I haven't used it since the Christmas Pudding Race on 18th December and, well, it's sulking. I'm sure all it needs is the promise of a bit of action and some sort of battery boost and it'll be just fine... I was also wearing my new new feet which were absolutely fine, although my back is still in bits from the original new feet. Does that make sense? Probably not...

The next step is to try mountain biking and running further. So, proper training is starting just 3 weeks before the MudRunner's Ice Breaker.

And even though I went running today I'm not sure how accurately it could be described as 'training' because:-

(a) I wasn't going very quickly; and

(b) I avoided all the mud...

It's a team... sort of...

2012-01-21T21:18:00.003Z

On Thursday I saw Ice Cream Sian for the first time since Christmas. I know it was the first time since Christmas as I finally gave her her Christmas present...

She said she'd read the recent blogs and then the conversation went something like this:

Ice Cream Sian: "So, you're actually doing the IceBreaker?"

Me: 'Yep!"

Ice Cream Sian: "And you have to be last?"

Me: 'Yep!"

Ice Cream Sian: "So you can't overtake anyone, you can't go in front and you have to be slower than everyone else?"

Me: 'Yep!"

Ice Cream Sian: "Can I come and be slow and be at the back with you?"

Me: "YAY!"

So that's what we're doing - Ice Cream Sian is going to enter as a proper competitor, and then we'll pootle round together - at the back! How much fun is that?

We're even talking about 'training'... I reckon I can try running in another week, we'll get out on our bikes at about the same time and we might even be good enough to achieve our target at the IceBreaker.

And our target is....

To keep the backmarkers in sight!

Officially last!

2012-01-15T18:52:00.003Z

Within an hour of emailing Elsie last Sunday the MudRunner's Head Of Everything, Kes, had emailed me with a proposition....

He asked if I would like to be the OFFICIAL backmarker on the IceBreaker! YAY! How cool is that? I get to go slowest, finish last and feel no pressure that some other poor soul is trailing round behind me... YAY! I am soooooooooooo excited!

I emailed Fit Mark (who has already entered as an individual, and his abandonment of his former 'team' has been duly noted...) who agreed my position as 'last to finish' was probably what I've always been training for...

It's five weeks today. Yes, I know I said 'it's five weeks today' last Sunday but that just shows I was right to give up trying to be an accountant as I clearly can't add up... Anyway, five weeks today - my physio sessions have finished, I am now on 'back and knee strengthening' exercises and I'm aiming to start running and cycling by the end of January - so that's 3 weeks to get fit enough to finish last. No problem!

And a challenge for when I'm cycling again: Before Christmas Fit Mark spotted the dog agility plank raised on two bricks that we have in the garden for New Running Dog to walk along... He has suggested riding my new mountain bike (MTB) along the plank would be difficult.

Honestly, how hard can it be?

An email to Elsie...

2012-01-08T17:29:00.002Z

Elsie lives at MudRunner and describes herself as the most heroically incoherent and incompetent race administrator...

Oh, Elsie, Elsie…

How could you?? I am referring, of course, to your email about how to achieve MudMaster status. I know I have to do ‘three different events’. I know. I’ve done Oblivion (heavy cold, twisted a knee) and Classic (knee brace slid down, unbelievably slow, loved the Muddy Tub Of Love) so I was all set for the IceBreaker (got myself a mountain bike and pink bike helmet and everything). All set, that was, apart from my slightly dubious knees… And then, aha, a breakthrough! I met a podiatrist who said ‘I can give you new knees in two weeks’ to the accompaniment of a yellow glow around his head and the sound of angels singing… Alas, he turned out to be an Incompetently Dangerous Imbecile Or Tosser (IDIOT) who has left me with ligament and joint damage around the old sacroiliac joint…

So your email reference to ‘hope your training is going well’ was a little upsetting. Indeed, as I type this there are tears streaming into my keyboard. Which is not good and will probably result in something of a shrotcirciut vrey qiukcly. There is, frankly, No Training At All happening. Well, not unless you count decanting sloe gin into bottles and making cakes… New Running Dog is doing agility classes so at least one of us is agile. Can she enter IceBreaker on my behalf? She’ll be good with the mud and the 10k (did you know it was actually 12.6k at Classic?) but might struggle with the bike although she’s a quick learner…

And the bit about ‘hope you had a good xmas’ was also sadly misplaced… coping with a slightly demented mother and four tons of Brussel sprouts led to a somewhat fractious xmas day which said slightly demented mother didn’t even remember by Boxing Day. But it’s ok, we have a plan for next year - we’re going to move her electronic date clock directly from 24^th to 26^th December and just tell her she had a nice time…

So to your final line of ‘there’s no way round it if you want to be a MudMaster (free MudMaster hoody, different colour race number and right to brag freely to all and sundry - what’s not to love) you have to do the IceBreaker’.

I KNOW!

It’s 5 weeks today. I have no working back and two dodgy knees. I can’t currently run, cycle or walk the dogs much…. So I only have one question:

If I don’t finish till it’s dark, will you wait for me??

Yours with much love and Happy New Yearness,

Sarah xx

Happy New Year!

2012-01-01T17:32:00.003Z

Well, sort of Happy New Year... I didn't blog last week as (a) it was Christmas Day and I was A Bit Busy and (b) I am injured yet again so it would have been a bit more whingeing...

To sum it up very briefly: Back very strained after Christmas Pudding race, sought physio advice, told to REST properly, also told to seek second podiatrist opinion, did so, second one said first orthotics way too aggressive, causing back pain. Apparently it's my sacroiliac joint, which at least is something I haven't strained before...

So, I haven't run, swum or biked for ten days, my back is still really uncomfortable and I'm rapidly going off podiatrists. I shall continue with the 'stretching cat' type exercises and the heat packs, and hope that it gets better SOON!

Will I make it to the start line of the Ice Breaker? I really don't know...

In the meantime, and in the spirit of all good Review Of The Year thingies, here are my highs and lows of 2011:

Best result: Completing two Mud Runners - Yay!

Worst performance: Ooh, which one to choose? There are so many... I think it's a heat between the triathlon with the brakes jammed on and the other triathlon where I didn't tighten my front wheel... Clearly I need to go on a bike maintenance course.

Best Mud: Classic Mud Runner in October. Hopefully in the future there will be video evidence of me going SPLAT on my face...

Best Team: The original Mud Running Team, of course!

Best photo: This really sums up 2011 - great team, great mud, great fun!

Happy New Year, everyone!

Christmas Pudding Race!

2011-12-18T19:42:00.005Z

On Saturday I had a weirdly wobbly moment and decided that everybody else would be faster than me and it would be better all round if I didn't even bother to turn up.... Defeatist or what? It had been a long week... I gave myself a good talking to, and got up ready and raring to go on Sunday....

So here I am at the start - I'd met up with Fit Mark who was obviously going to run ahead of me and faster than me (so what's new?!). I'm wearing my 'I Made It Myself' Christmas Pudding hat... There were a few people in fancy dress but it was largely proper runners. Proper Runners being those who actually know what they're doing...

I wasn't actually running with the dogs - Guy had them there for a lovely walk while I was racing. 'Racing' is actually another word for 'plodding' - did you know?

The start was delayed because of ice which was just fine because the queues for the loos were epic...

The start of the race goes straight up 'The Highest Single Sand Dune in Europe' - it's 808 feet! I had thought running on sand was going to be hard going, but it's actually really nice - very springy and soft. Better than tarmac!

At the top there was a real bottleneck so I stood around for probably 10 minutes, then we were off again... running down, then up, then down a huge dune... Guy got a lovely picture of the dune, I'm in there somewhere!

And it was such a gorgeous morning - cold but just look at that blue sky!

After the down dune we were back near the start then a couple of kilometres on roads and fields, then up again to the top of the nearby common (windy) and to the mulled wine and sherry and shortbread and mince pies stop. Damned Fine Idea. I had some mulled wine, hoping to regain the giggly state enjoyed with Beagle Nic last weekend. I obviously didn't drink enough to make it work...

After the common it was downhill to the sewage treatment plant (bit whiffy) then along the river and across the sand dunes to the finish. By this time I was seriously plodding - I have decided I'm one-paced. And it's a slow one-pace... And I met Guy and the dogs - fab! So obviously I stopped for a photo... Yes, you're right, I do look slightly pained... This was at about 8k and the last three (well spread out) marshalls had all said 'It's only a mile from here!'

I finished in 1 hour 23 minutes. The winning woman did it in 38 minutes. To be fair, she was in her twenties...

Still, on the plus side I've got two little Christmas Puddings - lovely! And lots of people admired my hat - fellow runners, marshalls and spectators.

To illustrate just how slowly I run, I had this entire conversation with a little girl and her dad in the space of about 10 yards:

Little Girl: "Come On Pudding Head!"

Dad: "That's not very nice, calling her Pudding Head..."

Me: "I think it's a jolly good name for me as I've got a pudding on my head!"

Dad: "Fair enough. COME ON PUDDING HEAD!"

Will I do it again next year? Probably!

And I'll try and be quicker...

Proper training?

2011-12-11T19:07:00.005Z

Having realised that the Ice Breaker is now only ten weeks away (EEEEK!) I've decided some Proper Training was called for. So on Monday I ran 5k, cycled 10k and swam half a mile... On Tuesday I did a mega-day at work (13 hours) and on Wednesday I did a 12 hour day. On Thursday I slept.... So much for pushing stamina to the limits then....

By Friday I was back on course (sort of) and swam and ran... then on Saturday I swam a mile and went out with Guy on the bikes. This is either going to get me super fit or finish me off...

Today was Beagle Nic's birthday (a big birthday with a '0' at the end of it...) and obviously all a girl wants to do on her big birthday is run in mud so we hoofed up to the top of Rudry Common with New Running Dog via some seriously good mud... What Beagle Nic didn't know was that I had hidden a half bottle of champagne (oh, ok - prosecco) in my backpack together with a couple of plastic wine glasses. Half way up the last bit of hill there was a 'phut' noise from the backpack and I thought the cork had popped with all the jigging around... I was waiting for the fizz to start seeping out but luckily it never did... Did you know if you pour fizz too quickly on top of a large hill in a strong wind all the froth gets blown to the next mountain? Eventually we managed to get some in the glasses and stood admiring the view while we sipped.

And do you know, running back down fortified by fizz was just lovely? Slightly giggly, there was a fair bit of puddle jumping going on and absolutely no pain whatsoever. Marvellous idea. Am going to replace isotonic sports drink in backpack with gin forthwith.

By this time next week I'll have completed (in some fashion) the Christmas Pudding Race. I've received my race number (something in the 700s) so there are going to be LOTS of runners. I do hope I don't come last... Apparently there is mulled wine and a mince pie at the halfway point (yay - alcohol and running!) and a Christmas Pudding at the finish. And I've sort of finished my hat. It'll be finished when I sew the top bits on and take the pins out. Probably a good idea... You will tell me if I look ridiculous, won't you?

And at a party this week Guy was chatting to somebody about mountain bikes and triathlons and mud running - the 'somebody' thought Guy did all this stuff. When Guy pointed out it was me the chap said 'blimey - hardcore!' How cool is that? Somebody thinks I'm 'hardcore'!! No, he hasn't met me...

And my challenge for this week is: Riding my bike on a plank six inches above the ground. It's a long plank. We have it in the garden for New Running Dog's agility training. Fit Mark has seen it and bet me I can't get more than a quarter of the way along it without falling off...

Honestly, how hard can it be?

Aaaarrrrggghhh, Oooooooh and Eeeeeeeeeeeeek...

2011-12-04T18:19:00.005Z

On Saturday morning Guy and I decided to go for a nice sensible ride on nice sensible tracks on the MTBs. I then made the BIG mistake of texting Fit Mark to say we were about to go out and did he want to see our lovely shiny new bikes. He texted back that he'd join us for the ride...

Gulp. You've seen Fit Mark in action (see November 13) and the words 'nice' and 'sensible' don't really apply.... So off we went. We headed for the pub (so far so good) and then veered off the sensible track into the realms of downhill and muddy. To be fair, he did give excellent advice on how to survive along the lines of don't turn, don't brake, don't stop and (this is my favourite) speed is your friend. Yeah, right. I duly bounced down various long stony paths and Fit Mark seemed duly impressed. Guy was FAR more sensible and walked his bike down the worst bits. To be fair, once I'd started and with 'don't turn, don't brake, don't stop and speed is your friend' ringing in my ears, all I could possibly do was hang on and aim downhill.

Fit Mark was far enough ahead (again - really, it's just like the running only with wheels) that he took some photos. It's a pity you don't get sound effects here, so I'll add what I was saying at the time...

This one is OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH!

This one is AAAARRRRGGGHHHH!

And this one is EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEK!

Actually, this last one almost makes me look like I can ride a bike. It was shortly before I wobbled off the track and straddled one of the little Christmas trees... very festive and all that.

So I'm wobbly on the bike, pretty scared of going downhill and my legs ached on the standy-uppy bits. And I LOVED IT! Hope to go out again soon - such a shame it's dark in the evenings now...

On Sunday, for a bit of gentle exercise, Beagle Nic, New Running Dog and I headed off to tackle The Tardis - a very long hill which is bigger than it looks... And Fit Mark joined us. Sadly I'm not sure Beagle Nic is ever going to come running again... Fit Mark laughed (oh yes, laughed) at her description of the Cardiff Half Marathon (which I'm still enormously impressed she completed) as being 'hilly' and promptly romped up the Tardis ahead of us. I ran all of it (yay) at, apparently, 'the walking speed of a toddler' while Beagle Nic sensibly walked, leading to the assertion (not by me) that she had the breaking strain of a Kit-Kat...

He then found us a slidey slippy downhill where I kept going in front but kept getting stuck in the mud so that Beagle Nic almost crashed into my backside.

Nope, she definitely won't run with us again...

Bikes! Or, as we now say, MTBs!

2011-11-27T14:29:00.008Z

On Tuesday the bike people said our bikes had been delivered, which they hadn't, and Guy had to get Very Cross with Parcelfarce so that eventually they delivered the bikes. In HUGE boxes. Because he had the dogs in the car and no bike rack, he couldn't get them home from his office. Hey ho. So on Wednesday he took the bike rack instead of the dogs, unwrapped the HUGE boxes and brought the bikes home. We have BIKES!

On Thursday (yes, we would have done it on Wednesday, but we have Dog Obedience School, so no time to play with bikes) we assembled the bikes... They were mostly put together, but there was a large long package attached to each bike. I thought it was a bicycle pump. Guy pointed out it was the handlebars, which I hadn't noticed were missing. Yep, that's about my technical level on bikes... So Guy did the attaching handlebars stuff, we added pedals and we cycled up and down the lane very carefully. Boy, those saddles are sharp! Fit Mark (who's about to do the 20 mile Brecon Sleepwalker so doesn't get to play with bikes) texted me to suggest that we alter the angle of the saddles... ooh, that's better.

On Saturday morning we cycled a reasonable route near home (hill, past pub, hill, forest hill, tracks, puddles, downhill, local farmers market for a cupcake having padlocked the bikes to a lamp-post, big hill, ice cream parlour, home) and it's FAB! The bikes are really lightweight and very speedy. Mine was even more speedy when I found out I was using the wrong gear thingy and got the right one sorted. We stopped at the ice cream parlour to see Ice Cream Sian who made suitable admiring noises. Her dad thought we'd simply found another way to expend energy, called them 'instruments of torture' and said we only had ourselves to blame...

As is customary, Ice Cream Sian and I posed for a 'first training session photo' of our IceBreaker training - the first time on bikes, at least. I think Ice Cream Sian's might need a little work...

On Sunday Beagle Nic was brave enough to come for another run, and this time I was sensible with my New Feet so we aimed for 8k. We started at Ice Cream Sian's house and went on the muddiest paths we could find in the hope of some proper shrieking from Beagle Nic. She sadly disappointed - she was still supremely elegant and WAY fitter than either of us - Ice Cream Sian asked how often Beagle Nic ran and got the answer '3 times a week'. She shouldn't have asked... it just makes us look bad really. There were a couple of promising squeaks (well, a little 'ooh' and a little 'eek') but it really does need work...

We did, however, find fabulous mud...

And we thoroughly enjoyed ourselves in the sunshine. I think we may have a new team... So we posed for a New Team Photo.

Notice how we ALL have the one knee bent in the best Posh Spice fashion... so that's all three of us who went to the same finishing school then! And if we have a new team I must remember to tell Fit Mark he's, um, not part of the team any more. Only because he's WAY too good for us - he outruns us on every occasion and by some significant margin. Maybe he'll want to come back with us now his Sleepwalker is over - it took place last night. We hope so - we're missing the insults. And talking of Sleepwalker, Fit Mark found himself two new team-mates, both of whom chickened out before the race. Pah. Obviously Ice Cream Sian and I would have stepped into the breach, but Ice Cream Sian had an ice cream parlour to clean and I had a long-standing engagement with Strictly and a glass of wine.... Otherwise OF COURSE we would have been there...

What are ex-team-mates for, eh?

Backs and bikes...

2011-11-18T16:28:00.010Z

On Tuesday the pedals arrived - YAY! We have PEDALS. Mean looking black ones for Guy to match his mean looking black helmet, and shiny red ones for me to match my shiny red face when I've finished cycling. We unwrap them, look at them longingly and then, because we have no bikes to put them on, we put them back in their boxes. Sigh.

On Friday a box from the bicycle people arrives at Guy's office! HOORAY! He texts to say a box has arrived and I get ridiculously excited until he sends me a picture...

It's a bit small, isn't it?? I mean, I know the bikes come in bits and all that....

Guy brings it home, we open it ... and it only contains the shinpads. Sigh. They look like something a Star Wars Clone Trooper might wear if he took up cycling.... And they're REALLY uncomfortable. How is one meant to ride in these? Guy points out I have them on the wrong legs and, yes, they are much better once I've swapped them over.

On Friday Ice Cream Sian and I also go for a muddy run. Before we set off I am mindful of my New Feet and not going too far, then promptly start having fun and forget all about New Feet and we carry on for 12k. Really good mud too - just in time for Beagle Nic's second muddy run on Sunday.

Except on Saturday morning I can hardly move - my back has seized up completely due to doing too much too quick in the New Feet. Basically (apparently, I understand bits of this) all my muscles in my legs and back are now having to re-align themselves to my new posture. This takes time and patience. Which I'm not very good at... All I know is that on Saturday I can only get myself out of bed by lifting my pyjama legs ... not great. I whimper a fair bit, take lots of drugs, apply Deep Heat and walk the dogs v-e-r-y-s-l-o-w-l-y. Guy suggests delicately that running again on Sunday might not be the brightest idea, and I'm forced to agree... I cancel our run. The girls are nicely sympathetic, and Nic texts me on Sunday morning to make sure I'm not doing too much. No, of course not. I've been very sensible, doing back stretches (picking up leaves), resistance exercises (pulling out seedling trees) and heat therapy (writing blog with a heatpad in place) as well as a 'few other little jobs' (fix lights in outside loo, clean cars, blow leaves off gravel, make wooden doorstops, do homework with New Running Dog, make four fruitcakes, get Guy on Twitter (@catsclawceilidh, thanks for asking), update his website (www.cats-claw.co.uk, again thanks for asking), clean kitchen floor and do shopping).

Hopefully by next weekend we'll have bikes. And a mended back. And as all the little jobs are done (really, how many more can there be?) we can have a whole FUN weekend doing RUNNING and SWIMMING and CYCLING - YAY!

Guy is suitably thrilled at the prospect.

Feet, elegance and bikes...

2011-11-13T19:42:00.004Z

Oh, and before we even start, the 'elegance' doesn't in any way refer to me...

So, the plan from last week was to try out new feet, run with Beagle Nic and try a MTB (which we now know is a MounTain Bike, even though I think it should be MB...)

Feet first. So to speak... I tried running with the new feet on Wednesday, and it was weirdly OK - both knees were fine, the feet felt fine for the first 2k and then the left one developed a spectacular blister... Heeding the advice of Gareth the Foot to 'listen to your body' obviously I stopped. Nah, of course I didn't. Blister - pah!

This morning Beagle Nic came to try out mud running. YAY! Ice Cream Sian couldn't join us so the two of us set off to find some proper mud - Beagle Nic normally trains on the polite pavements of Cardiff. Hah! Proper slippy stuff duly obliged and it really all went very well, but I have to confess to being a little disappointed.... No falling over (despite the promise of 'accident prone'), no wheezing (apart from me), no shrieking in the muddy slippy bits (Ice Cream Sian where are you when I need you?), and very elegant running, even in the slidey bits. I hope I haven't put Beagle Nic off completely with the mud, but I can see Ice Cream Sian and I are going to have to raise our game if she comes back for another go...

I did take some photos of Beagle Nic's inaugural run... I took them on my 'slightly wonky but it sort of works and I don't mind if I sit on it in the mud' Blackberry and now I can't find how to get the photos out of it... So, I'll describe them instead: Clean shoes at start, muddy shoes at finish, rubbish photo of Beagle Nic running through a deep puddle which was rubbish because I forgot about the two second delay on photos on the wonky Blackberry so what I actually got was a photo of a puddle and an arm going past me at some speed...

And then the bike... Fit Mark kindly said he would talk 'all things MTB' with me and Guy so off we toddled to his garage. Which is full of bikes and bits of bikes. I got to ride a very pretty PINK bike. Honestly, it's wasted on him, really it is...

This is Fit Mark in action:

And this is the sort of speed I'm thinking of:

Yes, you're right - stationary. Soooooo much safer, don't you think?? Note the pink top, pink helmet, pink socks, pink trainers and matching PINK BIKE.

I rode up and down the flat tarmac, then I got really adventurous and rode up and down our lane. Sorted! 20k Ice Breaker in February? Bring it on!!

So Guy and I came home and ordered mountain bikes following extensive advice from both Fit Mark and my nephew Charly who found us a stonking deal. We ordered bikes online. Never having sat on them. And - get this - they come WITHOUT PEDALS!! How can they call that a bicycle??? Bonkers. Completely bonkers.

And finally: Fit Mark is still training hard for the 20 mile Brecon Sleepwalker and this morning ran 18 miles. Yes, but did he sweep leaves and wash cars like some of us? Huh? Huh?

Team news...

2011-11-06T18:47:00.005Z

Well, 'team' is a loose term these days - what with Fit Mark finding himself new, young, fit men to run with and me and Ice Cream Sian not having seen each other since the Mud Runner (no, don't ask me how - I'm not entirely sure, we only live half a mile apart. In my defence I have been working hard and it's DARK at night now). Anyway, will Fit Mark still want to run with us next Mud Runner now that he's moving onto Serious Competitions like the 20 mile Sleepwalker? Should we be finding a new team-mate in the meantime?

I think we may have found someone....

I work with Beagle Nic. She runs with her dog, Rafferty (Raf for short) or, rather, she runs, he walks (he's been taking lessons from New Running Dog). As she was pounding the streets of Cardiff she passed a bus-stop as a woman laden with shopping got off the bus.

'Ooh,' said the woman 'Your dog walks faster than you run!'

'Thanks for that...' muttered Beagle Nic under her breath '...Fatty.' Class. Definite class.

So, once I get my new feet working properly (going ok, they get a bit tired with the orthotics, knees seem to be pointing in the right direction, thanks for asking) we'll go for a proper run with Beagle Nic and see how she measures up. If she's faster than us, fitter than us, quicker up the hills than us or says 'Eeeek' and 'Ooooooh' less than us, she's not our girl. On the plus side, she has invested in a pair of mud runners, and says she's spectacularly accident prone. Yay!

And I'm still thinking about the Ice Breaker in February (12.5k mud run, 20k MTB ride, 3k mud run). Guy and I met Fit Mark at the Ice Cream Parlour today (it's where all good meetings happen only Ice Cream Sian wasn't there) and I asked if he thought I could do it.

'No, but that's never stopped you before'.

Fair point. So we talked All Things MTB which I now know means Mountain Bike. (Passing thought - shouldn't it be MB otherwise surely it's MounTain Bike?) Anyway, me knowing what it stands for counts as progress round here.

Fit Mark reckons I need to actually TRY a bike out. Eeeek! He's offered me one of his (yes, it's a bit like guitars or melodeons - apparently you do need more than one) to try with him next weekend. Eeeek! In the meantime, he sends us a link for a bike he recommends and it must be good because it's got a Rockshox Tora fork with lockout and Shimano cranks! Yay! Hmmm, like I know what that means...

More importantly, it only comes in blue. Fit Mark says the colour is 'most definitely unimportant'. Such a boy response...

So, my targets for the next week are:-

1. Run with new feet. Any distance, any time.

2. Try a mountain bike. Or MTB as we now know to call it.

3. Run with Beagle Nic. And hope she doesn't break anything...

It's a bit of a week really...

Happy feet!

2011-10-30T14:16:00.003Z

I have new feet! Or new orthotics. Remember the picture of my very gorgeous shoes that I didn't think I could walk in?

Well, the new orthotics are as ugly as those were beautiful, but with the added advantage that they actually help me walk better. And hopefully run better...

But not pretty although they do have a little flash of purple on the instep. Mmm, nice. The idea is that they correct my inward tipping knees and make my legs straight. And, in the words of the old song 'the toe bone's connected to the foot bone and the foot bone's connected to the ankle bone and the ankle bone's connected to the leg bone and the leg bone's connected to the knee bone and the knee bone's connected to the thigh bone and the thigh bone's connected to the hip bone' which could explain, if my feet are out, why my ankles, shins, knees and lower back all hurt when I run...

Anyway, I'm hoping that these gorgeous new orthotics will do the trick. I picked them up on Friday and I'm allowed to wear them for an extra hour each day - so one hour on Friday (picking up a takeaway and watching telly - not exactly strenuous), two hours on Saturday (a yomp across slopey hilly fields with the dogs and sliding down muddy tracks - better) and three hours today (standing around making pumpkin soup and more dog walking) before trying them in my work shoes tomorrow. And no running until the middle of NEXT week. Eeek!

But I can still plan... and I'm working on my outfit for the Christmas Pudding Race at, um, Christmas. This is Phase A:

Yes, it does need a little work... It's going to be a Christmas Pudding Woolly Hat. With brandy cream, holly leaves and berries. No, really, it is! And hopefully a slight adjustment in the brim bit so that I can see where I'm going...

So, what with new feet and a new hat, I shall at least be sorted at both ends. Just the bit in the middle to work on then...

Fit Mark (who I still like to think of as a team member even if he has dumped us) ran to work through the woods and over Caerphilly Mountain at 7am on Thursday morning in the rain and the dark with a torch strapped to his head. He's in training for the Brecon Beacons Sleepwalker - a 20 mile night-time trail race.

And you think I'm mad????

And... rest...

2011-10-23T19:59:00.003+01:00

I haven't run this week. There's two reasons for this - my left knee, and my right knee. I was surprisingly un-stiff after the Mud Runner (which is good) but had promised myself two weeks 'not running' to try and get my knees straight again... So on Monday I saw Gareth the Foot, a podiatrist I had handily bumped into at a ceilidh recently who said he could help... He drew felt pen lines on my feet, pointed out that my knees tip inwards (I know!) and said that with appropriate insoles for my shoes I could have straight knees in two weeks. Yay! I've left him making me insoles and I can't wait to get them fitted... hopefully by next weekend.

So, in the meantime here are two people who have inspired and amazed me this week:

Firstly, Fauja Singh. If you haven't heard of him, he's just run the Toronto Marathon at the age of 100. ONE HUNDRED!!! Good grief. As I'm only half his age (plus a bit) I figure I should be able to romp around a Mud Runner or two.

Secondly, Beagle Nic from work. We've travelled together on the train and I've wittered on about my knees and mud running and all that stuff. She just quietly got on with training and last Sunday whilst Ice Cream Sian and I were sliding around Herefordshire Beagle Nic ran the Cardiff Half Marathon in just two hours 25 minutes. WOW! I am SO impressed. And she just did it... didn't tell anyone, no fuss, no nothing - just did it. Wow. She's promised to come mud running with Ice Cream Sian and me soon - fab or what? We'll convert her from roads to mud, no problem...

So with no running, what else to do? Enter stuff, obviously! I've got a sought-after slot in the Christmas Pudding Race on 18th December at Merthyr Mawr - it's 10k, sand dunes, mulled wine at halfway, Christmas Pud at the finish - what's not to love?!

And a dilemma... I've now completed two Mud Runners. If I do the 'other event' that the same people organise, I get Mud Master status.... And you know how competitive I am! Trouble is, the third event is a duathlon - the Mud Runner course, then a 20k mountain bike ride, then a 'cheeky 3k mud and river' run. Gulp. Mountain bike?

So - is it a step too far, or a challenge to be tackled?

And, more importantly, what's a mountain bike?

Muddy Photos...

2011-10-19T19:54:00.000+01:00

Do you know, I'm STILL smiling about Sunday - it was SUCH fun. Can we do it again this weekend please???

So here are some photos. And a bit more info.

We’re meant to be a team. Really we are. So we have T shirts. They say ‘Got-a-Sec?’ on them because that’s what we’re called. Fit Mark says he’s happy to be part of the team but, really, we’re beginning to wonder…. Take a CLOSE look at his T shirt. The fact that he’s facing the wrong way says a great deal.

Fit Mark ran a LOT quicker than Ice Cream Sian and me. Over an hour quicker. Although now I’ve uploaded my clever watch thingy stats, our ‘moving’ time was actually only 1 hour 54 minutes. YAY!!! Under 2 hours!!! YAY!!! We knew we’d been stuck waiting at a bottleneck for a while, but we’re THRILLED to clock under 2 hours.

And before Fit Mark says it: Yes, we know if we hadn’t stopped at the bottleneck we’d have been more puffed and gone slower. Yes, we know we stopped to look at the view. Yes, we know we usually stop at some point anyway. But we can still call it ‘under 2 hours’ can’t we? Well, we are anyway…

Fit Mark nearly always spots the cameras – and smiles, like this:

(Oblivion, May 2011 - and it's very possible he's smiling because I'm about to sink...)

This time he was Concentrating Hard. Look!

Honestly, he should run with us, because we had FUN!

First of all there was mud…

Then there was deep mud…

Then there was the slidey mud…

And Ice Cream Sian just kept on smiling….

Yes, we did a lot of talking. Yes, we would have been quicker if we'd gassed less. But it was such FUN!

And we did make it to the end:

And the Muddy Tub of Love...

You're right - the water was a little murky. Fair enough though - there had been 1250 people in it before us. It was still hot though - bliss!

And then there's this. Fit Mark posing for a photo at the end. Not only is he VERY clean, but that looks suspiciously like a very young, very fit 'team' to me... Hmmm. Ice Cream Sian - I think we may have been dumped!

And a final final note: This morning I found mud in my ear. It's Wednesday. So that's after one hot bath, three showers and a swim since the Mud Runner.

Memo to self: Get a better loofah.

MUD, glorious MUD!

2011-10-16T19:00:00.002+01:00

Today was The Day - Mud Runner 2011. Glorious weather at Eastnor Castle, Fit Mark raring to go, Ice Cream Sian and me drinking coffee and putting off the 'lets get going' moment...

And then we couldn't put it off any longer... EEEEK! The first 100 yards was fine, and then there was a river crossing that I nearly missed because I was so busy talking. Oops - nearly headfirst into it... then a long (very long) uphill and not a lot of mud - wet summer, dry week before Mud Runner, about the worst combination you can come up with... Finally we got to SERIOUS mud - you can tell it's coming up because there are people shrieking up ahead. Brilliant mud. It dries green so everyone looks like they're wearing wellies... There was a steep slippery uphill out of the mud and one lovely lady was standing at the top helping other people by offering a hand - how kind is that?

Half way round (ish) there was a water station so we stopped and admired the view. Would have been rude not to... Had a nice chat with the fabulous ladies (and gents) acting as marshalls, asking where the view was... and now I can't remember where it was except that it was Herefordshire... Very pretty though!

More hills, more mud, serious swamp at the end. Maybe the word 'swamp' should have given it away? Bit stinky too... I got stuck to my knees and then went SPLAT spectacularly - straight down. Hope the photographer got that one!! When I eventually prised myself back up again the pattern of my shirt was visible in the mud - how fab is that?!

Ice Cream Sian was incredible. She ran much more of it than I did (I walked up some of the hills, shame on me) and Fit Mark ran off at the start (as arranged) and posted a proper time. So much so that by the time Ice Cream Sian and I finished he was clean, re-dressed and had walked back to the last river to take photos of us. (Photos tomorrow!)

After the finish we entered the Muddy Tub of Love - a huge 'bath' made by putting a pond liner in a shell of straw bales and then connecting it to a totally enormous antiquated boiler. Fab - hot water. Although as over 1200 people finished ahead of Ice Cream Sian and me, a somewhat muddy bath...

So here are the most memorable bits of today:

The madness of runners: We passed a girl early on flat out nursing her ankle while her friends looked after her. We asked if she was ok and if we could do anything. "No, it's OK, I'm fine, it's not broken, it's only ligaments..." I hope you're really ok!

There were over 1350 runners.

Fit Mark was 78th. In a time of 1 hour and 9 minutes.

He was the EIGHTH person over the age of 40. YAY!

Ice Cream Sian and I were 1256th and 1257th respectively in 2 hours 16 minutes.

I was the 15th female over 50 to finish. Which sounds good except there were only 16 females over 50...

And the Most Amazing Bloke award goes to Rick who did the whole thing in a spectacular off road wheelchair. In just 3 hours 39 minutes. Amazing.

More photos to come soon...

Half way home in the car I realised I could still smell The Swamp...

It's ok, I've had a bath now!

Stamina training in the West Country

2011-10-09T15:11:00.003+01:00

Last week we were on holiday. Well, I call it 'holiday' and Guy calls it 'stamina training'. Honestly, all we did was walk for 3 hours a day. Well, 3 hours in the morning and then another hour later. Unless we were cycling, in which case it was an hour or two's cycling after the three hours walking. What's not 'holiday' about that? Huh?

We had rented a cottage near Bideford, cunningly planning to be near the Tarka Trail so that we could walk, run and cycle in non-trafficky comfort... and so we did all three...

We've tried to add up the miles we walked, but gave up at about 37... I ran 10k from Bideford to Puffing Billy (which was appropriate as I was Puffing Sarah by the time we got there) on the Tarka Trail which is an amazing 180 miles walking route.

The bit from Barnstaple to Torrington is 'shared use' so has a combination of bikes, walkers and dogs on it alongside the saltmarshes and mud flats. Ah, yes, the MUDflats...

New Running Dog is coming along nicely. She goes to school on a Monday night now and is really very obedient. She comes back, sits, runs beside me and is increasingly agile so that if I point she'll jump over fences, walk along walls, hop up onto benches, stuff like that. I forgot. I thought a picture of her admiring the mud flats from the top of the wall would be nice so I pointed at it.

Being a good obedient girl, she jumped straight over it.... Luckily it was sort of sloping on the other side and within a split second she was twenty feet below us and thoroughly enjoying herself deep in glorious mud.

She thought it was LOVELY. Obviously we panicked - how the hell to get her back up? No problem - she simply ran up the wall. Like Spiderman. Or Spiderdog. Good thing the tide was out though....

On Friday (our last day so we took it easy) we walked across sand dunes at Crow Point (you have to go there, it's a brilliant place) for a couple of hours. New Running Dog did the most running - she found a stick she liked and took it all the way to the top of the dunes, down to the sea, top of the dunes, down to the sea, etc, etc....

And of course I climbed to the top of the sand dunes too... I really should have taken my mud runners and I could have run round the beach, over the dunes and in the sea...

So instead of running we hired bikes from Barnstaple station in the afternoon and cycled 12 miles to Instow.... All in the name of triathlon training, obviously - we hired hybrid bikes, to see if I was less nervous on a 'normal' bike instead of my slightly twitchy racing bike. Nice at lower speeds, but not so much fun going fast. Weirdly I'm not nervous on the racing bike when I'm racing, just when I'm out for a 'bike ride'. Very strange... Anyway, the hybrid was nice, worth a try and makes me think I'll try and raise my handlebars on the race bike to be more comfortable... Guy came with me, so he did the 12 miles too.... He was a bit quiet afterwards. Something about 'legs', 'muscles' and 'knackered'...

Just a week to go to the Mud Runner then. I have my number and timing chip through the post. Eeeeeeeeek! After all the holiday walking I don't appear to have a single knee that doesn't ache, so I'm relying on New Zealand Calming Knee Balm, pain killers and Lucozade this week. My usual cocktail - it'll be fine...

Kilometres towards target(s):

Ice Cream Sian: 28 + ? Er, I don't know... I haven't seen her since I got back!

Me: 61.4 + 10k = 71.4k.

I don't think I'm going to reach 100k before next Sunday. Not if I want a working knee, anyway... the plan is to do 10k on Monday, 5k on Wednesday then 6ishk on Friday just to loosen things up. Total will be about 92k.... sooooooo close!

Mind over matter

2011-10-03T14:48:00.013+01:00

On Monday afternoon I took New Running Dog on The Pink Run. And I was RUBBISH. I was running like an old woman - slow, aching limbs, head down. RUBBISH. So I gave myself a severe talking to (much to the surprise of New Running Dog) and tried again. Better - by the end of the run I was fairly romping along, legs not hurting, going twice as fast, enjoying it again. YAY!

On Wednesday night the weather was so glorious we headed for Rudry Top again. I swear that hill gets steeper every week... Pretty much the same time going up, but 4 minutes faster coming back down. FOUR MINUTES!! Instead of 49 minutes I was 45 minutes. See - positive thinking.

And on Friday Ice Cream Sian, New Running Dog and I all went out on our newly found 10k muddy route. Before we set off I watched Ice Cream Sian lacing her trainers and showed her the extra holes where you can really secure your laces and make sure your shoes don't come off... She didn't use them this time, but promises to relace them for next time.

So what happened when we reached good old Caerphilly clay?

Yep!

Now, much as I would love to say that that is Ice Cream Sian's shoe, it isn't. It's mine. Oh dear. And I did lace them properly.... honest!

Saturday night Guy's band were playing the Heath Ceilidh so I danced. Because of the fab hot weather there weren't many dancers, so I danced all but one of the sets - about 3 hours bopping, in all. Phew. Dancing seems to use different muscles to running but I figured I was fit, so I kept going.

Stiff on Sunday morning? Oh yes... Meanwhile, Rubbish Running Dog had slipped on the kitchen floor and, being an extreme drama queen, had said that one of her legs had come off and she 'couldn't possibly even BREATHE without dying although yes, quite possibly I could manage just a little food it might help me feel better'. Yet New Running Dog was very very very bouncy, so what to do? Yep, send me out with New Running Dog to do a quick (hilly) 4k to tire her out. Didn't work at all - after 4k she was still bouncing, and it was me that was tired out...

Back to Mind over Matter - on Friday I ran with Ice Cream Sian and forgot my knee brace. Didn't even notice for the first 3k.... Then I noticed and began to feel a twinge. Again, gave myself a severe talking to and it was just fine.

Even better, I met a podiatrist at the ceilidh on Saturday night who reckons he can sort my knees. YAY! Says he's just moving house and will let me know when he's available for consultations again. I don't mind lying on the floor surrounded by packing crates - honestly, can't we just crack on and fix it?!

So, kilometres towards our target(s);

Ice Cream Sian: previously 18 + 10 on Friday = 28.

Me: previously 38 + 6 on Monday, 5.4 on Wednesday and 12 on Friday = 61.4

There might be a change of scenery this week.... will keep you posted next weekend! Just two weeks before the Mud Runner now - I am getting ridiculously excited!

Insulted. By a dog...

2011-09-25T19:25:00.004+01:00

On Wednesday New Running Dog and I headed for Rudry Common again... she still finds me dull to run with, so entertains herself with the 'wait a bit then run past' routine.

As we got to the steep rocky part I slowed up. (Yes, Fit Mark, I can run even slower than usual...) and New Running Dog was walking beside me.

Then she yawned. Actually YAWNED. I was sooooooooo insulted. Who needs Fit Mark's insults when one has a dog that YAWNS? Good grief.

On Friday morning Ice Cream Sian and I went out for a 10k muddy run including lots of hills - the best practice for the Mud Runner we can manage! New Running Dog came too - and didn't yawn this time. Phew.

The mud was fantastic. Serious recent rain and lots of mountain bikers = MUD! Absolutely brilliant, and just look at the state of our feet:

If there were qualifying photos required for the Mud Runner we'd be in without any problem...

New Running Dog and I ran up to Ice Cream Sian's house and back home again afterwards - 12.2k in all...

Just 9 hours after the muddy photo was taken I took another one of my feet:

See, I can do clean.

Sometimes.

After our 12k on Friday my knees were so stiff I made a very sensible decision (yes, ok, I'm a wimp) not to run at the weekend, as Ice Cream Sian and I have plans to run on Monday afternoon... So I swam a mile instead....

So, kilometres towards our target (which was 50k or 100k, depending on who set it...)

Ice Cream Sian: So far: 8k + 10k this week = 18k

Me: So far: 20.4k + this week's 5.4k + 12.2 = 38k.

We have THREE weeks before the Mud Runner. Eeek. I need to do at least 20k a week then...

And in case you were wondering, Fit Mark is still running - he's busy training properly (weirdly, the 'runs' that Ice Cream Sian and I do don't qualify as 'training) for the Sleep Walker - a 20mile night time run through the Brecon Beacons on the last Saturday in November.

Thank goodness he hasn't suggested we give it a go...

MUD, targets and the Great North Run!

2011-09-18T20:15:00.003+01:00

Ice Cream Sian and I were SO pleased with our new target last week - 50k before the Mud Runner. At least, we were pleased until Fit Mark said 'Target? Nah - should be 100k!'

Hmmm....

So, Wednesday I took New Running Dog out for 5.4k to Rudry Top (that's the top of Rudry Common - 2.9k uphill to the top, 2.5 downhill back home) and on Saturday morning I did a 'little' 4.5k with New Running Dog just to get my legs moving.

It was muddy. Very very muddy. YAY!

As I was so revolting I decided to carry straight on and do the muckiest job I know - pressure hosing the steps and patio. By which time I was even muddier... what to do?

Yep. Pressure clean my feet!

Look at that - they are GLEAMING! Even the socks!! Am now seriously considering hiring a mobile car wash vehicle to offer a steam-clean service to runners after the Mud Runner for a fee.... I'd clean up! (Ho ho ho).

This morning Ice Cream Sian and I went out for a longer run. Well, a shorter longer run than we intended because of Ice Cream Sian needing to get back to get ice cream to a show.... 8k back to Ice Cream Sian's house, which didn't seem very far so I then ran the long way home, and then a bit more up the lane to make 10k then remembered I forgot to start my clever watch thingy for a while at the beginning so really it was 10.5k...

And I didn't even get my shoes dirty. Well, not very...

Pressure hose, anyone?

The plan now is to increase our distance by 2k every week, so by the Mud Runner we'll be up to 14k. Eeeek. Oh, and today was of course the Great North Run. And, um, we've decided to do it next year. Gulp. We'll have a girlie weekend in Newcastle and, um, do a half marathon...

So, kilometres so far towards our 50k target which Fit Mark thinks should be 100k:

Ice Cream Sian: 8k

Me: 5.4 + 4.5 + 10.5 = 20.4. YAY!

And my tip of the week: Don't pressure hose your bare legs after running. It stings a wee bit.

Targets!

2011-09-11T19:35:00.004+01:00

Remember the 'Machen 8 in less than an hour' target? And the fact that Ice Cream Sian and I were well over 1 hour and 5 minutes? Well, this weekend Team Got-a-Sec did it in 37 minutes!

BIG YAY!

So this morning Ice Cream Sian turned up to run. 10 minutes late, but with quite the best excuse for being late I have ever heard....

'Sorry I'm late, I had to fish Barbie arms out of the van.'

'Just the arms?'

'Yep.'

She was also wearing a fab T shirt...

Run 10k?? The Machen 8 is actually only 8.2k... Oh, and that's the 'don't look at me I'm a wreck' position...

So off we set. Chatting as usual - mostly about the Proms In The Park in Caerphilly being cancelled last night - so sad, it would have been brilliant with the castle in the background, but the rain was torrential... Can we have it again next year please and try again?

I made the mistake, halfway round, of saying 'this isn't as muddy as I expected' and then we slid the rest of the way in the, er, MUD. Still, it's something we should be getting used to as the Mud Runner is in FIVE weeks time. Eeeeek.

After our efforts we had the whole 'who gets the most purple in the face' competition and decided the only way to decide was to take photos.

Not that I'm competitive or anything....

But it's my blog... I win!

So, having smashed the 'Machen 8 in under an hour' (OK, so it was only Fit Mark who ran that time but, hey, it's a team event so it works, he did it yesterday with an extra '4 miles or so' in the middle) Ice Cream Sian and I settled on a new target.

In the next 5 weeks, we'll run 50k. And be fit for the Mud Runner.

Just 10k a week then...

New Running Dog and New Running Technique

2011-09-04T14:24:00.003+01:00

As the Mud Runner is 6 weeks today (EEEEK!) I've stepped up my 'training', or 'practising' as it might more reasonably be called.... so, THREE runs this week! Yay!

On Wednesday after work I strapped on my knee brace, gathered up New Running Dog and set out in the general direction of Rudry Common - the top bit. New Running Dog seemed oddly unkeen and sat down. I ran on, then ran backwards shrieking 'Come on!' and 'YAY!' in a thoroughly excitable fashion - and she ran to catch me up. We jogged on and she stopped again. Backwards running, 'Come on!' and 'YAY!' and she caught up. We carried on in this fashion until the real uphill started at which point I ran out of puff for calling out and just ignored her, figuring that she'd either catch up or give up. I must have been a hundred yards ahead of her when she started running - very fast - and with her speed she passed me in a few seconds. Then stopped. I jogged on, she waited, she hurtled past me and stopped. Suddenly I got it - she was making it more exciting for herself by waiting and then speeding past me. She adores running fast - better than almost anything else apart from swimming - and clearly my rubbish running was just Too Damned Dull. Hilarious! Or, at least, fairly hilarious but it makes New Running Dog nearly as insulting as Fit Mark...

On Friday Ice Cream Sian and I did the Machen 8 (actually it's 8.2) again. We chatted, we jogged, we didn't chase a time, and we still shaved 45 seconds off Ice Cream Sian's previous best time. Hooray! Maybe we really are improving? Our time even included me having a chat with my brother on the mobile whilst running... multitasking or what?

And this morning I was out at 8am with New Running Dog again - same technique on her part: hang back, rush past with eyes shining, ears flapping and tail wagging. Same technique on my part too: jog, pant, jog, pant, jog, pant, go purple. I would have been running with Ice Cream Sian but on Saturday night we were both helping out at her dad's charity fund-raising event and after several glasses of wine each we agreed running was A Bad Idea. We were right - my legs were like lead for the whole 5.6k... I really must crack this whole 'preparation for running' thing.

However, there's one enormous upside of New Running Dog's latest technique...

At least she pants a bit now.

Dogs and PARTY!

2011-08-30T13:13:00.003+01:00

I had the best of intentions of cracking the ‘Machen 8 (actually it’s 8.2) In Under An Hour’ on Wednesday, but then thought my legs were still tired from their exertions trying for the time on Sunday, so took New Running Dog out instead - we’d intended to ‘just do 5k’ but, as with Ice Cream Sian before, 5k turned into 10.5k… Not very quick, but we did stop to have frequent pees (New Running Dog), take a breather (me), have a drink (mostly me) and Sniff Stuff (mostly New Running Dog, occasionally me - the honeysuckle really is lovely at the moment). We also stopped to take pictures of our muddy paws (yay - mud in August!!)

...and our happy smiling faces. One of us has a Very Long Nose.

And we both threw ourselves in the river on the way home. New Running Dog went slightly farther out than me because I remembered, just in time, that I had my iPhone in my pocket…

By the time we got home I was absolutely shattered. And fairly purple of face. New Running Dog didn’t even have the decency to pant…

On Sunday Fit Mark celebrated his 40^th birthday. I know - 40! How OLD is that?! Yes, ok, not very… Anyway, he had a fab all day party at his house, so obviously it would have been rude not to go - so I went twice. Once at lunchtime for a spot of lunch and a glass or two of wine, then again at 6pm when Guy was back from Morris Dance Festival Playing Music Things and I had mown the grass, walked the dogs and done work stuff… Damned Fine Party. And Fit Mark seemed pleased with his cake - planned with the help of Ice Cream Sian, and made with marvellous modelling help from Guy…

That’s Louise taking a pic of Fit Mark in the mud (chocolate ganache to you and me) with Charlie watching on. Round the back of the cake obviously we had to include Ice Cream Sian and me...

I’m the asleep one with the gin - Ice Cream Sian is the awake one with the socks and the wine. Looks nothing like us….

On Monday morning when everybody else was still sleeping (or hungover), Ice Cream Sian and I had another crack at the Machen 8. Did I mention it’s 8.2? Anyway, she overslept, I decided to take New Running Dog, I set off without Ice Cream Sian, she drove ahead and ran back to meet me by which time Guy had texted to say she was going to catch me up so I’d gone back towards home… it was a mess but finally we met up, we ran, we lifted New Running Dog over various stiles, and we chatted all the way round. Rubbish time. Actually, not totally rubbish, given the various delaying tactics we’d used (starting at different places, going the wrong way, carrying dog) - we did it in 1.09. So in fact we’re now NINE minutes off our target time. We seem to be getting slower…

Too late - I’ve entered us for the Mud Runner anyway as Team Got-a-Sec? on the basis that my time last week was 'close enough'. We have a plan. We’ll all start in the first wave and Fit Mark can gallop off at a decent pace to maintain the honour of the team, while Ice Cream Sian and I jog round at the back having a fabulously muddy time. Provided we’re fit enough to enjoy it.

And we’re famous - again! The lovely (and every so slightly nutty) people at The Mud Runner have made our picture this month’s ‘Win A Hoody’ competition - you have to come up with a caption.

We’re presuming this is ‘Win A Hoody’ as in ‘warm sweatshirt type thing with hood’ as opposed to ‘hooligan’.

We live in hope…

And the time is...

2011-08-21T19:46:00.006+01:00

You'll remember Fit Mark's challenge: Run the Machen 8 (actually it's 8.2k, I just want you to know that...) in under an hour before September or you can't enter the Mud Runner in October.

Eek. Up until now the best time that either Ice Cream Sian and I have managed is 1.05.17. Being one hour, five minutes and 17 seconds... I did some maths and worked out the fastest time we'd done over each kilometre (my first time with Fit Mark I was quick on the second half, and the second time I was quick on the first half and pretty much expired on the second half) and added them all up - 1.02.39. Still eeeeeek. So to be under an hour I have to shave another 2 minutes 39 seconds off a time I haven't actually even run yet.

I think the pressure must have been getting to me because last night I dreamt I did it - but only by having Guy standing with my bike on the nice flat bike route so I could cycle that bit and padlock the bike at the other end... I'd then carry on running where the bike couldn't go and Guy would find the bike, take it to the next flat road bit and I'd pick it up further on and pedal the flat road bit too... I reckoned I might just make it. And that was, quite literally, In My Dreams.

So, Sunday morning, crunch time. There's only 1 week left before September.

All prepared, and GO! I have all the kilometre timings written on a bit of paper stuffed in my running shorts. As each kilometre passes I check to make sure my clever watch thingy is showing faster than the bit of paper. Half way round and the time is at 29 minutes... So therefore under an hour should be a doddle, right? I hadn't allowed for tired legs though... and feeling faint. And blurry eyesight. Although, to be fair, this latter might have had something to do with the fact that I later found out I'd only put one contact lens in...

Anyway, the bramble scramble was better - positively whizzed down the slope so beautifully cleared by Guy last week, but then my legs were like lead and it was REALLY hard work on the homeward, mostly flat, stage.

And the time?

SO CLOSE! That's 8.2k in 1 hour, 0 minutes and 44 seconds.

Try again on Wednesday...

By the way, did I mention that Ice Cream Sian didn't quite make it under the hour??? Probably because at the time I was pounding my way round the Machen 8 (actually it's 8.2) she was sleeping off last night's party somewhere in a tent in Cornwall....

In the afternoon, for light relief and a little bit of gentle exercise, Guy and I took Rubbish Running Dog and New Running Dog to the beach with Nic and Gareth and their 3 bonkers dogs. Gareth threw balls into the sea, the dogs chased and chased and chased, I swam and Blunkett sat on the sand. New Running Dog had to work hard to keep up with her 3 new chums, and the photos are fab:

This is Layla winning the 'I can leap highest to get the ball' game...

And this is New Running Dog coming out of the water - totally fab photo, that's going to be my new background on the computer!

And Rubbish Running Dog?

She enjoyed the sunshine...

Phew....

2011-08-14T19:46:00.005+01:00

I had the very best of intentions of running in the week. But, well, the best laid plans and all that.... Still, never mind, Ice Cream Sian and I had an arrangement to run at 7.30am on Friday morning from her house. I turned up to find her looking un-ready for running as she'd forgotten to tell hubby Richard our plans and he'd gone to the parlour so she had to stay home with the children... We chatted work for a bit (the parlour is now a fully fledged proper client of mine), I remembered I had a 10.30 meeting and I said I'd go run on my own.

Yeah, right.

I decided to try running without the knee brace. I got 100 yards and realised it was A Bad Idea. I walked back to the car and added the brace. Tried again. Got 100 yards again and realised it was still A Bad Idea. So I gave up and went home for a swim instead...

On Sunday Ice Cream Sian and I had arranged to run again. This time she turned up and we set off on the Machen 8, trying to get finished in under an hour so that Fit Mark will allow us to enter the Mud Runner in October - he's set us the challenge of doing the Machen 8 in less than 60 minutes before September. (Little known to him we're entering anyway, but we'll let him think we're not just yet). We were quicker on the first 3k which is uphill, but we turned into complete wimps on the 'very steep downhill mind you don't break an ankle' bit. We lost about a minute just on that part of the run - it is really steep and full of brambles - how Fit Mark just bowls down it is a mystery to us...

When we were near home I thought I could just be under my fastest time if I speeded up a bit, so I abandoned Ice Cream Sian ('no - go on, run, get the time, don't think about me') and ran as fast as I could for home. Slower than my 'personal best' by 6 seconds.

SIX SECONDS.

After an hour and 5 minutes, I was SIX SECONDS slower. Do I mind? Yes, yes and YES. I will be quicker next time...

Ice Cream Sian wasn't far behind me, and collectively we shaved 30 seconds off our previous time. We have three weeks to go and at 30 seconds a week we're going to be three and a half minutes over the hour. Bummer. So we're now going to do the same run on both Fridays and Sundays - and take half a minute off each time. Then we might just make it...

To help us speed up I thought it would be helpful to cut back the brambles from the steep downhill where we're both such wimps. So after I'd recovered from the run Guy and I and Rubbish Running Dog and New Running Dog set off to do the Machen 8 again. At a walk and with secateurs.

It felt a lot more uphill at a walk.... we stopped and chatted to a nice lady walking her dog for ages and Guy did a lot more de-brambling than either of us had intended, and he's really improved the steep downhill.

There are now No Excuses for not running this bit quickly. On Friday. Eeek.

Doing the Machen 8 at a walk with dogs and secateurs and Being Chatty To Other Dog Walkers took nearly 3 hours. So today my little legs have done 16.4k and I've been exercising for 4 hours. And we also mowed the grass. Active? Oh yes...

And we've discovered that New Running Dog is part Pointer. We found this out by meeting a dog who was identical out on a walk when both us and the twin's owner shouted 'SNAP!'. Twin Owner knew that hers was a Labrador/Pointer cross (we think that makes it a Pointador) and the two were almost impossible to tell apart - so that's what she is. Knowing nothing about Pointers, we have now looked them up and found that they are tireless, hugely energetic, love running and make great jogging companions.

I plan to go running with her every morning before work.

I think you'll find the key word there is 'plan'....

Tri and Tri again...

2011-08-07T18:46:00.005+01:00

Fit Mark has set Ice Cream Sian and me a challenge. He reckons if we can't do the Machen 8 in less than an hour by September, we're not fit for the Classic Mud Runner in October... Ice Cream Sian and I duly turn out at 7.30am on Friday and complete the Machen 8 (actually it's 8.2k not that I'm being picky or anything) in 1.05.46. Not bad! We're fairly sure we can shave off 5.46 by September - Fit Mark's not running with us until then as he has (in this order) Charlie's birthday, mountain bike, mountain bike, his own (fortieth - gosh he's OLD) birthday and the 6 Moor Miles run filling the weekends between now and then. So, we have a target. And we'll do it...

In the meantime, as I was looking for another tri to try before the end of the summer, on Monday evening I came across the Lydney Tri Club Triathlon. You may remember that back in April (16th, imprinted on my memory as The Day I Did My Hamstring In Being A Pantomime Cow) Fit Mark offered me the Bluebell Hill run and I was so fixated on 'bluebell' that I missed the word 'hill' completely. Now, the triathlon is a bit different - this time it's the word 'club' that I've completely missed. A triathlon club is full of very fit people who are hugely competitive and train, properly, to do triathlons. In fairness, I did email and say 'I'm a total beginner I don't want to be the slowest is it suitable' to which they responded 'yes of course give us your 35 quid'.

We pitched up at Bathurst Lido in Lydney at 8.20am this morning, helped by New Running Dog waking us up by barking at 5am. Please, if anybody has a cure for night barking, TELL US NOW. We're soooooooooooo tired being woken up by New Running Dog at either 1am, 3am or 5am. At the moment my favoured solution is taping her very long nose shut overnight which might not entirely find favour with the RSPCA... Anyway, we were at the lido good and early and I plonked my bike on the racking and got chatting to the other competitors. Much hilarity ensued as I was allocated the number 007 - about as unsuitable as it could be. The others expected me to either emerge from the pool looking like Ursula Andress (yeah, right) or in a tuxedo (also yeah right). I pointed out that I did my last tri with the brakes on to dampen their expectations...

Yes, that is a number 7 imprinted on my arm with indelible pen. I also have one on my leg. I expect they'll wear off. Eventually.

The swim was in Bathhurst Lido (lovely outdoor pool at a balmy 20c) so no need for a wetsuit (hurrah!) then the 20k bike was around the local Forest of Dean roads and finally a 5k run through Lydney Park Estate (which apparently had lovely rhododendrons about two months ago). There were four waves of the swim start (only about 25 competitors in all) and I was in Wave 3 - the second fastest. Eek. My fellow wave members all said they were novices and then shot off down the pool doing Olympic style crawl at a hugely impressive speed.

By the end of the first 40m length they were half a pool ahead of me. To be fair, they didn't get any further ahead - I'm a one pace swimmer and they weren't any quicker, apart from at the start. As I was finishing the last wave was just starting, then I was out and on the bike and away...

It was a lonely bike ride on the A48 around Lydney - wide roads, fast cars and long slow hills. I swear it was more uphill than downhill. I got passed by 3 impressive looking cyclists, all with those 'resting forward' handlebars that you only use when you know what you're doing, and then by a young girl in a proper tri outfit going uphill faster than me. Gradually it dawned on me (I think because of the organisers taking down the directional arrows as I went past) that I was the last out on the cycle run. Bummer. They pulled alongside me in the car and asked if I was ok... I said I was struggling a bit and they said not to worry 'it's all downhill or flat from here'.

They'd clearly been to the Fit Mark School of Motivational Speaking. There was another long slow uphill and a particularly vicious windy uphill to come, then a longer downhill... By the time I got back to the transition area everybody else was coming back from the run, at which point I decided 'enough is enough' and I chickened out of the 5k (hilly) run. To be fair, if I had done it the organisers would have had to wait another 45 minutes or so and would never have got home to their Sunday roasts.

I handed back my timing chip and my number and they said 'come and get your T shirt'. Obviously my response was 'No, thank you - I haven't completed so I shouldn't have one'. Hotly pursued by 'Oh, OK then...' as you should never look a gift horse and all that...

As we packed up and left a few runners were still coming back in - I would have been a long way behind and it wouldn't have been much fun on my own, so we came home and THEN I went out and did my 5k run. Hah - completed it after all, then! Albeit it with a gap and some lunch in between the cycle and the run...

So I'm wearing my T shirt. Not necessarily with pride, and with very tired legs.

And I'll watch out for that word 'club' in the future...

Is it meant to hurt this much?

2011-07-31T19:42:00.002+01:00

So Week Two of Proper Training with Ice Cream Sian and Fit Mark. Except an early morning text from Ice Cream Sian at 7.11 said that she was still ironing staff uniforms for The Big Cheese (humdinger of an event in Caerphilly) so wasn't going to make it, so it was just Me and Fit Mark who set off at 7.20. And I'd brought a drink for Ice Cream Sian and everything....

We were doing the same route as last week, the obvious point of it being to Do It Faster. I tried, I really did (well, ok, apart from the bit on the cycle track where I was looking to see if there were any nice mushrooms in the grass verges) (there weren't) but my legs just wouldn't work today - like rubber. Or jelly. I never did quite decide what...

And after about 3k I realised I was still carrying the drink bottle for Ice Cream Sian. Looks like I'd started Fit Mark's Penalty Packs without him even trying (except he's now decided he's going to call it Waterloo Water Torture). I tipped the drink out (I'm sure the bracken next to the path appreciated the isotonic properties) and spent the next couple of hundred metres taking my backpack off to get the empty bottle back in the zippy bit. Which at least distracted me from how much my legs hurt.

Towards the end I was watching the time on my clever watch thingy.... From memory last week's time was 1 hour 04 minutes. I was determined to beat it, but just couldn't make my legs go any faster... We made it back to Fit Mark's wheelie bin (every finish line should have a wheelie bin) in 1.05.17. Bummer.... All that effort, and I was a minute slower.

Except - hang on! I have a rubbish memory, so actually last week's time was 1.05.48. So this week was 31 seconds faster!

Yay?

Proper training and PLANS

2011-07-24T18:40:00.005+01:00

And so proper training starts again. Proper training for the Mud Runner Classic in October, that is. And it's only 'proper training' because we're doing it with Fit Mark again. Except it wasn't 'we' this morning as Ice Cream Sian didn't arrive, so it was just me and Fit Mark. This is Not Good. I need help to combat the insults... To be fair, he didn't really go on about the 'brakes on' issue. Well, not much anyway.

In the week I'd suggested 6-8k would be a good starting point, so Fit Mark took this as '8.2' obviously. I should learn and say 'mmm, about 3k would be good' and then I'd only have to do 5... Anyway, he said it would be flattish (as much as anything is flat around here) and we would concentrate on speed. Hah! Speed? Has he seen us run? Well, yes.... Quite.

Anyway, it was a lovely run (gorgeous scenery, partly on Machen Forest Trail, passed a fabulous blue hydrangea, nice blue sky, glorious scenery) only slightly spoilt by my wheezing.

Fit Mark says that when he runs hard he sounds like Darth Vader with asthma. I wouldn't know - he's never had to run hard with us. Compare the following two photos taken at the end of our 8.2k - so, who exactly is the most purple?

After Fit Mark had stopped laughing at the brakes issue he revealed he has plans. Well, actually, they should be called PLANS. These mostly involve some sort of penalty system for certain points on our runs - whoever gets to the big tree last etc. And I think it involves carrying extra weight as we run. Of course, Ice Cream Sian knows nothing about this yet, and we clearly need to talk about it and come up with Counter Plans.

I'm not entirely sure Fit Mark understands us. I think 'chocolate', 'wine' and 'gin' would be much better incentives....

Official results... and photos!

2011-07-17T19:23:00.007+01:00

It's been a week since the 'brakes-on-Tri' and I've very nearly stopped sulking... Still can't believe I did it. Soooo stupid. So I've been looking for another triathlon to do this year - and I'm not making much headway. Found a lovely one in Portishead in Bristol (nice and local) but then I looked at the photos and everybody in it looks like a professional. I'd be finishing about an hour after them.... And then there's another one at the Cotswold Water Park (water, swimming, good) but it starts at 7.30am on a Sunday morning on the same day that we have tickets for Dolly Parton in the evening... 5am leaving the house, anyone coming to watch? So I've decided I'll make my own triathlon... I can swim here, find a 20k route on the bike which Guy has promised to accompany me on in case I fall off (or do something stupid like, oooh, jamming the brakes) and then I can run from here too. Sorted. And there is another race I'm going to enter.... but more about that another day when I've practised a bit. And the Mud Runner Classic in October...

So, official results. Hmmm. There were 43 in my class and after the swim I was 26th. After the cycle I was 34th and that's where I stayed... 3 people gave up on the run, which at least I didn't do. My official time was 1 hour 46 minutes 59 seconds. Hey ho. However, I was the only female over 50 competing in any race so I'm quite chuffed about that. Maybe everybody else over 50 has more sense?

And the photos...

I rather like this one of me coming out of the water because (a) it proves I did the swim and (b) by half way up the blue lake exit runway I've raised my goggles and got my arms halfway out of the wetsuit - proper triathlon transition! I may have to buy an off the shoulder evening frock after seeing this. Although I probably wouldn't swim in it.

And here's a nice cycling one. I'm smiling, so this is after I'd released my brakes. Evidently 'before the brakes' I looked a little cranky...

And, no, you're not going to get one of me running. They're horrible. My hair sticks up (so what's new) and I'm an interesting shade of puce.

We're still watching the Tour de France (trying to pick up hints and all that - I think I need one of those mechanics cars following me though) and am hugely impressed by the advertising that they have on their bottoms. There was even somebody at the Open Golf this week with advertising on the back of his troosis. I think this is something I could pursue...

Although I can imagine what Fit Mark would think I should have written on my backside...

SLOW - PLEASE PASS....

So... what went wrong?

2011-07-11T12:11:00.008+01:00

Well, it wasn't the logistics - we got the whole car/dogs/people issue sorted by the addition of a very natty bike rack to the back of the Fiat...

We spent the weekend with good friends Sarah and Vincent and on Sunday the dogs needed the Fiat (yes, dogs need Fiats) so we took the wheels off the bike and put it in the back of S&V's Panda. Very simple - lesson from V on how to put wheels back on (easy - wind little rubber nut, put wheel in place, push lever to back, pull gears, insert other wheel, flick lever, dab brakes, done) and away S and I went for a girly triathlon day out.

And it wasn't the wetsuit... Other than the usual grimaces it went on ok.

I even checked that I could bend over in it - and it was fine. And, yes, I did apologise to the poor chap in the background. I think I put him off his lunch...

And it wasn't the swim - we set off, I counted strokes, I felt oddly constricted in the breathing department but otherwise ok, and it was over before I drowned, which is always good...

It was the bike.

As soon as I set off I thought I should have done more time on the exercise bike. It was into a strong headwind on the first 2k alongside the lake, and I was really struggling. On the return side of the lake it was better but I was still pedalling really hard and going nowhere. After two laps I was genuinely thinking of calling it a day, then the wind dropped a bit and I heard an odd grating noise. I looked round for someone to ask (not sure why - it was a big field, what was I hoping for? A tent with Halfords written on it???) and as there was no-one (big surprise) I had a good look at the bike whilst still toiling away. Front end looked ok, but seriously odd grating noise from the back wheel. I looked down and found the problem.

The back brake was jammed on.

Remember the bit about 'dab the brakes' after 'replacing the wheels'? Well, that's more than I did. Forgot that bit completely, brakes were jammed on. Hard work pedalling. As soon as I dabbed the back brakes (and, to be fair, I didn't either stop or fall off) they freed up and WHOOOSH - away I went. HOORAY! Suddenly I was whizzing along - and working a lot less hard.

YAY! Well, YAY except that I was already knackered from having done 12k of the 20k bike phase with the brakes on.

By the time I got to the running bit I was wiped out... so it was more jogging than running. I think I was about 38 minutes (same as last time) which wasn't bad with wobbly knees and rather odd light-headedness. There was water available on the run stage, so I chucked several cups over my head. Drank a bit too - very nice. I should have been able to have a drink on the bike but I'm always a bit wobbly (more especially so when I'm Pedalling Hard Because The Brakes Are On) and I couldn't get the top of my water bottle... I did try my teeth but stopped when all my molars started hurting...

When I eventually finished of course I did the whole 'never again' thing and decided that maybe this would be more my event (just the 5 lap version - don't want to go mad):

So, there we go. My time on my clever watch thingy says I was 1 hour 48 minutes 23 seconds. But I forgot to stop it as I passed the finish, so it might be a bit less - the official timings will be out in a day or so. Last year was 1 hour 42 minutes. So I was slower...

When we got home we watched some of the Tour de France. They are very fit and they cycle very quickly.

But, to be fair, they're not doing it with their brakes on...

Triathlon No. 2

2011-07-10T20:26:00.003+01:00

It's Sunday night, it's 8.30 and my legs ache...

I'll send more details tomorrow, but for now it's enough for you to know that today I completed my second triathlon. Marginally slower than my first triathlon.

There's a really good reason for this and tomorrow, once I've steeled myself for the inevitable ribbing from Fit Mark, I'll tell you what it is...

You'll never guess.

New team-mate and a logistical problem

2011-07-03T17:15:00.005+01:00

I'm doing a triathlon a week today. Eeeek. (And please give generously to the little blue box to the right - yes, I do need sponsoring!) On the plus side, the knee is improving nicely and now has a splendid knee brace to help it do running stuff, and I'm swimming and cycling every day because the knee says it's ok. Phew.

However, my team-mates are deserting me in droves... Fit Mark has gone to France (really, all he had to do was say he didn't want to run with us any more) where he says he's watching the Tour de France (and I do hope he wasn't that spectator in the yellow jersey who caused them all to crash) and Ice Cream Sian has shows which need ice cream coming out of her ears and wasn't able to run this morning, although we did do a very nice little 4.2k hilly run on Friday which was enough to make us realise we're (a) unfit and (b) unfit. So, what to do?

Get a new running companion, obviously.

Meet New Running Dog. Yes, she is the same colour as my knee brace. I do try with this whole fashion thing.

She's absolutely gorgeous and we picked her up from Many Tears Rescue in Llanelli on Friday... she's very nervous and very underweight so she's not even running as far as me for the moment, but she's Definitely Showing Promise. She's almost a labrador... and we think the other bit may be, er, greyhound. She is FAST! This morning she was confident enough to run around in the woodlands at full tilt and she is really, really quick. Bounding around, she flattened Rubbish Running Dog twice but didn't get away with it the third time - a quick sidestep by Rubbish Running Dog meant that New Running Dog just sailed past and had to execute a pretty nifty hand-brake turn to come back with her tail wagging.

And this is what poses the logistical problem. How do we get two dogs, two humans and a bicycle into a Fiat 500 for the triathlon next weekend?

Answers please by email or text or letter or postcard or pigeon. Just answers please...

Tintern Trot...

2011-07-01T16:52:00.001+01:00

Yep, Thursday was the Tintern Trot - 10k including a Very Big Hill and Team Got-A-Sec had agreed to do it... but that was before my knee packed up. So, did we do it? I'll let Fit Mark explain....

~~Got A Sec~~ Not A Sec Race Report.

The Tintern Trot.

So picture the scene. A wonderful summers evening, the beautiful backdrop of Tintern Abbey, and a lone member of the Got A Sec running team forlornly waiting for the starting gun amongst 200ish club runners.

Was it Sarah, the Imelda Marcos of the group? Nope (probably out buying more shoes)

Was it Ice Cream Sian who is training for a half marathon? Nope (AWOL)

Or was it Mark who had suggested the race in the first place and got a firm yes from both the others? Of course it was!

The race started on the Tintern side of the old railway bridge and I loitered near the back of the starting area waiting for the off. The field was mostly club runners and there were some very fast and fit people there. I was hanging out with the club members who run for fun and for the social side of running. When the klaxon sounded for the start, off sprinted the real athletes and then we ambled along behind. Once over the bridge, we followed the old railway line along the river towards Chepstow for about a mile. I gradually picked my way through the slower runners in front of me until I was running on my own in a gap of about 100m.

After the 1^st mile, the course started to climb up towards Offa’s Dyke and gained about 250m in elevation over about a mile. I made up serious places here especially the super steep section where everyone I passed was walking. The hills around Waterloo had me well prepared for this section of the race. There was then a ½ mile descent and another climb before we gained the top of the ridge and made our way through the woods on some really nice technical single track. This really suited me and over the next mile or so I passed a few more people.

With about 2 miles to go one of the marshals was counting places and I was in 53^rd position and just behind the 1^st lady. (I may have misheard and she may have been the 3^rd lady, but it was hard to hear over the noise of my breathing. I sounded like Darth Vader with asthma.)

We then started to descend back to the river, down a super fast trail across a long grassy field. Despite the protestations of my knees I let gravity do most of the work and performed what would best be described as a controlled plummet for the next ½ mile or so. A couple of people passed me as the course flattened out, but thankfully there was another gradual climb which allowed me catch up and then a really steep technical descent down a rocky chute where I passed them both again.

There was about 200m to the finish and one bloke in front of me who was within catching distance. I wound up my pace and started to sprint just as I caught him. Sadly this was also the point where I realised that in fact there was still 300m to go as I had misjudged where we were. At this point I was committed so continued to sprint making noises that probably haven’t been heard on that bridge since the age of the steam engine. Thankfully the chap I had passed was in no state to catch me and I wheezed over the line in about 50^th place.

The official results aren’t up as write this, so I don’t know my actual position. However I can give you my facts and figures.

The Tintern Trot – 10k offroad.

Mark - approx 50^th place - time 47.33

Sarah - DNS (Did not start)

Sian – DNS

Oh, in protest at the poor showing from my team mates I didn't even wear my Got A Sec shirt. I also didn't have my free beer. That will show them ;)

Shoes, stupid, shoes and polo...

2011-06-26T19:23:00.003+01:00

This week I have bought two pairs of shoes for completely different reasons....

Firstly I decided I should, on occasion, be able to look Really Smart for work. It doesn't happen often, but I don't have any Really Smart shoes. Or frocks, for that matter, so on a wet Saturday we went shopping... I tried things on, Guy said 'lovely' or nothing at all (which means 'not lovely') and I duly bought frocks. And then shoes. I fell in love with these instantly and they were in the sale so they were a complete BARGAIN. And then I got even more discount because one had been in the window so the colours don't match. But it'll be ok because now I've put the other one in the window at home so it'll fade too.

No, I have no idea how I'm going to walk in them.... Very slowly, probably.

And I've been having more physio because of the aborted run last weekend. And then (this is where the 'stupid' bit comes in) I realised that when I started running (August last year) I had knee problems until I got some orthotic shoes for my overpronation. So when it came time to buy trail running shoes what did I do? Yep, bought ordinary ones off the shelf. DOH! How thick is that??? And how long ago??? January. Good Grief. So I phoned a proper running shoe shop in Cardiff and asked if you can get trail running shoes for overpronation and was told yes, of course, (stupid question, apparently) so I went and got some.

These are as ugly as the other ones are beautiful...

But at least I'll be able to walk in them.

And then my lovely sister-in-law phoned to say that my niece, Gemma, was playing as an invited rider at the Polo At The Castle in Cardiff and did we all want to go and watch... so we did!

This is Gemma when I was trying to ply her with champagne before her riding (she sensibly declined):

And this is her in action... She rode two different ponies and the second one didn't want to go anywhere near the ball or the arena hoardings. Apparently not great assets in a polo pony...

Talented or what? And her brother, Charly, is of course the sub-48-minute crocodile. What a pair. It's Charly's birthday today (happy birthday Charly and all that) so obviously I sent him a present like a good auntie:

A lump hammer and a bolster.

And an addition from Fit Mark...

2011-06-20T22:05:00.002+01:00

As I took so little part in yesterday's efforts, Fit Mark decided he should really step in and provide a decent commentary on the training run... Enjoy!

So it started much like any other run with the "girls".

7.30am on a Sunday outside Sarah's house.

Ice Cream Sian (ICS) had been up all night looking after a poorly daughter, and I was suffering from minor bout of food poisoning.

Sarah was fine, and full of the joys of spring.

We set off at our usual pace (slightly slower than a glacier) along the flat of the lane that leads to the woods above the village. We dropped into the woods still maintaining our sloth like speed and then started the run up the "pylon field" to Rudry. At this point as the gradient moved a couple of degrees above the horizontal it all started to go wrong. Sarah was dropping back in obvious discomfort. We eventually made it to the top of the field and then “jogged" through Rudry and onto the common.

My plan was to skirt around the west side of the common and pop out onto the road without having to climb very far. Sadly at this point Sarah gave in to the inevitable and had to stop.

We were only 1.2 miles from home and about 200m from the village, so I had no qualms about carrying on. ICS on the other hand was most concerned and wanted to go back with her. At the time I thought she was being caring, but now looking back it is possible that she may have seen a sneaky way of avoiding what was going to be quite a difficult run.

I do have to admit that I have never been on the path that I was planning to run up, although I thought I knew where it went. Sadly it would appear that most of it is nothing more than a dotted green line on a map. So it was that I then subjected ICS to a steepish plod through wet waist deep bracken almost to the top of the common before hitting another path and then improvising what I thought was an excellent “short cut” to meet up with my original route.

Apparently a steep wet slippery descent followed by another long gradual climb cannot be described as excellent!

Our slight detour had cost us a bit of time so after splashing through the woods we went right up “Catch 22” – so called because there are 2 ways out and they are both horrible – and then dropped round the quarry. I took this opportunity to tell ICS about how I had been chased by an angry cow just where we were only the week before while running to work. I was most surprised then to see her face fall as we came to a field containing the offending bovine and many of her friends. “We are not running through there are we?” said ICS. “Of course” I said, “it will be fine”. She countered with “no, you’ll be fine as if we get chased you don’t have to outrun the cow, you just have to outrun me”. I was shocked at this damning statement and also her uncanny ability to read my mind.

Of course we were fine and I even waited until we were out of the field to recount another story about how I and a couple of mates had been chased by a really angry bull in the very same field. She didn’t seem to enjoy that either!

Once we reached the farm it was downhill all the way home and we fairly scampered the last 2k to be greeted by a limping Sarah who was sporting Waterloo’s running accessory du jour, the ice pack.

Total distance 11.16k. Average speed, slower than a tectonic plate.

Ouch!

2011-06-19T15:57:00.005+01:00

On Friday Ice Cream Sian and I went out for 5k. Or it was meant to be 5k until Ice Cream Sian said 'let's do the Tardis' at which point it immediately became 10k. Or it would have been except I got the ending wrong so it was 10.5k. I really should use a map. Or put ribbons round the trees... Anyway, Ice Cream Sian was amazing and simply ran up the Tardis in one go. No stopping! I stopped about 5 or 6 times - rubbish really but I'm still getting back to fitness after my long layoff. And my left knee is still complaining - on the inside this time, which at least is a change, but with painkillers and anti-inflammatories really it's fine.

And today it was the 'old firm' back together again - we started at my house at 7.30am, with Fit Mark saying he'd had a stomach bug for two days, and Ice Cream Sian having been up all night with one of the children being sick... so it was only me who was fit then. I did half an hour of knee stretching and warming up exercises just to make sure.... and then gave up through pain at 1.85k. OUCH. After some kind words (Ice Cream Sian - she is so NICE) and some sensible advice along the lines of 'you don't want to run on that' from Fit Mark they went on, whilst I phoned Guy who came and picked me up. Again. I'll get some more physiotherapy tomorrow - I have them on speed dial! Come to think of it, they may be able to retire soon on the amount they're making from me at the moment.

By the time Fit Mark and Ice Cream Sian arrived back at my house 12k and some serious hills later, I had my leg elevated, iced and rested whilst working with the laptop on my knee. It sounds like they had a fab time, and they've each promised to write a bit for the blog on the basis that I can't because I wasn't there. I'm particularly looking forward to Ice Cream Sian's account of Fit Mark telling her about his friend who was employed to fish dead bodies out of caves after cave-diving expeditions because if you go with a friend and they get into trouble apparently the rule is that you carry on otherwise you'll both be dead. Nice. And obviously a comfort to Ice Cream Sian as they trudged their way around the local quarry...

And I have a PLAN. Given that my knee is better when (a) elevated and (b) packed with ice, I am going to invest in an old-fashioned bath chair so that I can keep my knee both elevated and iced, and either Fit Mark or Ice Cream Sian can push it!

I haven't told them about it yet, but I'm sure they'll love it!

And an amendment....

2011-06-13T20:16:00.002+01:00

You know the bit where I said Ice Cream Sian and Fit Mark had been doing stuff other than running (or nothing at all in Ice Cream Sian's case)? Well.... I've had a slightly miffed email from Fit Mark saying that along with all his other cycling and gorge jumping activities he has ALSO been running - up to 20 miles a week, so after 5 weeks he's done nearly 100 miles! Good grief. That means he is now in Padstow, Cornwall, which is a bit of a pity as we thought we might all go for a run on Sunday... maybe he can run the 100 miles back?

After our rubbish distance measuring yesterday I went out again today to try to nail the '5k round route from Ice Cream Sian's house' and duly found a 5.2k route... although it might be easier if I learned to do it online.

At one point I was wheezing my way long a narrow lane and some young lads on bikes passed me going the other way - the front one yelled out 'watch out lads there's a lady jogging'.

It might be jogging to you, matey, but it was flat out to me...

Normal service is resumed...

2011-06-12T19:37:00.005+01:00

The pool got mended on Tuesday. Not before the skimmer was delivered at 8.30am and proved to be the wrong skimmer and the liner was so tight it took three of us to get it pulled into place (Guy, me and Somerset Scott).

We began to add water from the outside tap and then there were more screws to be put in and, no, you can't put it in dry, there has to be about half a pool of water for it to be done. And it was f-f-f-f-f-f-freezing.

At this point the water is about mid-thigh deep, 14 degrees and we're trying to get the front bit fixed. You can see that my back is totally dry and my front was, er, wet - this was from reaching down to ground level to get screws in. Underwater. Under cold water...

Then finally about 7 o'clock at night we got done - so of course I swam to prove it worked. And it was STILL only 14 degrees. That's why I'm a bit pink...

I thawed out about half way through Wednesday...

It's been 5 weeks since I've been able to run. In my absence I would love to be able to say that Ice Cream Sian and Fit Mark have been training every weekend. Er, no. Ice Cream Sian said it would be mean to train while I couldn't, so she has run precisely once in the 5 weeks, and Fit Mark has been pursuing Other Avenues. Such as mountain biking and Gorge Scrambling. Yes, Gorge Scrambling. I have no idea what this is, but he sent Ice Cream Sian and me this email:

It was just as well we didn't arrange to run last weekend as I could barely move on Sunday morning after the Gorge Scrambling on Saturday. I was covered in bruises and my arms, shoulders and back were in bits. It would appear that repeatedly jumping 9 meters off a river bank into ice cold water is physically demanding. Who knew?

Quite clearly bonkers.

On Thursday I decided I'd had enough of knee twinges and that I'd try a gentle jog. I thought I'd just run up and down the lane a few times... but then that wasn't going to be much of a workout, so I ran to Ice Cream Sian's, then the forestry track looked inviting so I went up it, then the first way home looked overgrown so I went on a bit... about 3.5k in all.

On Friday I went out again and went even further because the first field had long grass which was difficult to run through, so I went a kilometre round (much more sensible) - total of 4.6k.

On Saturday morning Guy and I went out on the bikes because it was such a glorious day. It seemed to be uphill both ways but I'm guessing it probably wasn't? Must do more exercise bike practice!

And this morning, for the first time in 5 weeks, Ice Cream Sian and I went out together - hooray! And, yes, it was PIDDLING with rain. Really torrential... However, once we were wet (took about a minute) it was really fun, being thwacked in the face by wet leaves, slapped around the calves by wet bracken, and sploshing through puddles on the road. Boy, we were WET. We were so wet that when I got home I simply chucked myself in the pool, fully clothed, and swam a mile... As you do.

And the distance? Well, we said we'd 'only do 5k' but the last time we said that we got carried away and ended up at 12k. So this time I said I would drive to Ice Cream Sian's house and we'd run 'only 5k' from there. But as it was so wet I couldn't figure out how to get back into the car again afterwards without soaking the seats, so I ran up to Ice Cream Sian's. Then we hadn't really worked out a route and I didn't have my contacts in so when I thought my watch said 3k it was in fact 4k and it ended up being 6.1k back to her house. And I ran home which made it 7.2k. And of course I'd run up which makes it 8.3k.

Still rubbish at maths, then...

Pool progress

2011-06-05T22:02:00.003+01:00

Well, not really progress in the usual sense of the word...

Before my last blog I'd ordered all the parts. They were duly despatched on Tuesday to arrive at my office on Wednesday except they didn't arrive at my office because they'd been sent to home and of course both Guy and I were out working so the first we knew about it was when we got home to find one of those 'we delivered you were out we'll deliver again tomorrow' cards which was no help at all because we'd be out at work again so I phoned their automated answering service and asked them not to deliver again but said that I would collect from the depot which was sort of on my way home on Thursday so I called in but they couldn't find the parcels and asked what they looked like which I couldn't help much with as I hadn't packed them although I did say it was a pool liner which usually looks like a body bag and a few other bits probably in boxes so they did a bit more hunting and found two boxes but nothing looking like a body bag so I brought the two boxes home and investigated only to find that the liner hadn't been sent so by the time I phoned the supplier to query this it was Friday morning on account of it being delivered to the wrong place on Wednesday and not collected from the depot until Thursday and the supplier said that as they hadn't got one bit of the four parts needed for the liner they hadn't sent the other three bits but they hadn't told me they hadn't got the fourth bit because they expected it to arrive and was that ok and could I just hang on for a bit which I explained wasn't ok because we were hoping to have the engineer fitting everything this coming Tuesday so to 'just hang on a bit' wasn't really an option especially as the bit they hadn't got was underlay which is pretty common and I could buy it locally so they agreed to send the other three bits to arrive on Monday properly delivered to my office this time and also said that the underlay might yet arrive on Friday in which case they would send it but at 5pm they emailed to say they'd only sent three bits as the underlay still hadn't turned up so first thing on Saturday I hit the internet and the phones and tracked down the requisite foam stuff somewhere in Cardiff and the firm confirmed that, yes, they had it and, yes, they had enough but, no, I couldn't get it on Saturday as they had nobody to cut it so would Monday do which I explained that it wouldn't as I was working so they agreed to cut it as long as I could give them a few hours which was easy and in the meantime we concentrated on painting the newly sanded pool walls with Hammerite before it was time to go and get the cut underlay which only just fitted into the Smart car and then we spent today putting in a new damp proof course and the new underlay for the liner which should turn up looking like a corpse tomorrow in which case Somerset Scott can still come on Tuesday to fit all the parts and I should be swimming by Wednesday or Tuesday if I don't mind it being cold which is apparently good for muscles, according to Phil Tuffnell on TMS although Guy says I must be mad to take fitness advice from Phil Tuffnell who was apparently somewhat averse to any kind of training but I am so desperate to get my knee better and do some exercise that I'll probably just chuck myself into the pool when it's just about deep enough.

Phew.

Little blue box... not a Tardis...

2011-05-30T15:18:00.004+01:00

You'll by now have noticed that little blue box lurking on the right asking for money. Yep, I'd like you to sponsor me please! You will remember that this all started last year when I competed in the Tri for Life at Eton near Windsor. Well, I'm doing it again, and there are three VERY good reasons why I'm asking you to sponsor me.

1. When I did it last year I had wonky knees and couldn't run before the Big Day. This year I not only have a pulled hamstring, courtesy of being a pantomime cow, but also iliotibial band syndrome and an empty swimming pool. As of today I can't run (only one working knee), can't cycle (ditto) and can't swim (no water in pool). This is what the pool should look like:

Note the important points here: (a) relaxing ambience (b) pleasant outlook (c) lack of tools and (d) water. Especially note (d).

What we currently have is this:

You see the problem - neither (a), (b), (c) nor especially (d). Even if we turned the tap on there's no motor - the prop shaft shattered so the water doesn't move. I could do two strokes to make a length... except we've now ripped the liner out, so the water wouldn't stay put anyway.

Back to why you should sponsor me:

2. It's for a REALLY good cause - well, four causes this year. Tri for Life pools all the money raised and splits it between four charities. This year they are Breakthrough Breast Cancer, WhizzKidz, Rays of Sunshine and Great Ormond Street. Just have a look at the links on the 'charities' page of the Tri for Life website and you'll see what great work they do. Last year you helped me raise a fantastic £560. This year my aim is to raise £1,000. I'd like to be in the top 5 of the charity fund raisers. Well, let's face it, I'm not going to come in the top 5 triathletes, am I?!

3. Because I'm a cool and sophisticated person. I can prove this... On Saturday Guy and I went to watch the test match between Sri Lanka and England at Cardiff. The marvellous team at TMS frequently described the spectators as 'hardy'. Too right - it was FREEZING! Also wet, and very windy. I wore a very fetching rain hat and spent a good deal of the afternoon with a Sky camera pointing at us in the crowd. Because I looked cool. At some stage the rain stopped and I took the hat off. It was only after we got home, some hours later, that I ran my hand over what was left of my hairdo and discovered the label from the inside of the hat stuck to my hair. So the question is, just how many hours had I been wearing a 'Liz Claiborne - Small, Rainproof' sticker on my head? See - cool.

For any of you that are TMS followers, we made them a cake...

They posted it to Flickr and so far it's been viewed over 6,400 times... nice comments too. We particularly like 'Cracking cake Gromit' from Severn Coracle... still not entirely sure how Flickr works, but we're working on it. Been playing with Twitter too. Any tips as to what we're meant to do on it?

So that's it for this week - no training, no pool, one working knee, but tremendous wet weather training undertaken at the test match. This week we are looking forward to Chiselling Rust Off Pool Walls and Repainting With Hammerite.

All good arm strengthening stuff...

Phut...

2011-05-22T13:19:00.007+01:00

I still have medal envy... I'm not proud of it, but there we are - envy of Charles' medal from the Bristol 10k. It's a very fine medal, from what I remember... And he made it to the front page of the Bristol Evening Post too!

Bottom right hand photo - obviously he's the green splodge, being a crocodile...

I had physio again on Wednesday and was told to keep doing the ice on the back of my knee and not to run for two more weeks, but it's ok to cycle and swim, as long as it's not breaststroke. So at least that's a great reason to practise my front crawl which looks lovely but usually leads to me swallowing half the pool and running out of air after 35 strokes.

On Wednesday night I did 5k on the exercise bike (bad idea, really sore knees) and half an hour in the pool - using the water jets as massage hydrotherapy, then tried to do my rubbish crawl. Another couple of weeks of this and I really should improve. I'll forget the bike and stick to the swimming and hydrotherapy.

On Thursday the pool went PHUT. Yep, that's the only way to describe it - PHUT. I was letting the water do its stuff, there was a bit of a clank, a PHUT noise, a host of black bits shot into the pool and.... well, nothing really. No power, no current, no nice hydrotherapy.

I phoned the US where the pool came from. Did I want to troubleshoot? Yes please. 'OK, so you take the 4 screws off the front grille cover then locate the propeller inside it should turn but not as easy as a ceiling fan then check the hydraulics you want to drain about a gallon of fluid off but if you get less that may mean you have a kink or a hole in your hose and you'll have to check the system by the way you have drained the pool haven't you?' I asked if I could abandon the troubleshooting and have an engineer instead.

They sent me details of an engineer who I phoned first thing on Friday. He's Scott and he's from Somerset - he sounds lovely. And like he knows what a gallon of fluid might look like. He's visiting on Tuesday and thinks my motor may be dead and the black bits could be what used to be the propeller.

A new motor will have to come from the US, unless the only UK stockist (in Edinburgh) happens to have one. I rang them. They've just had a consignment of 8 motors arrive, and think only 7 were on back-order. I've put my name on number 8, just in case... Wee Gill was in Scotland this weekend so I found myself wondering how she'd take to a 'hello can you bring me back a motor and a propeller please' type phone call...

So I turned my mind to training, bearing in mind that I currently can't run, can't cycle and now have no pool to swim in. What's the only sensible thing to do?

Yep, I entered a triathlon....

Bristol and the 10k...

2011-05-15T19:16:00.004+01:00

Sunday. Bristol. The 10k. As Charlie had said he would be running as a crocodile I found a suitable outfit to run alongside him and we dutifully posed for photos, so this is Crocodile Charlie and Charlie's Aunt...

I'm not sure which outfit is least suitable - Charlie in his furry croc suit, or me with my wraparound crocodile. He's called Ike, by the way. Well, if the Beckhams can name their kids after where they were, um, you know, then I can call my crocodile after where he came from, even if it is a large blue and yellow Swedish furniture store...

We set off. Charlie manages to find Guy in the crowd and 'high-fives' with an unknown member of the crowd nicely in shot... Obviously I'm too busy running for any of this stuff...

And then later on Charlie grins at Guy AGAIN. Must be a little galling for the people wheezing and panting around him, as Charlie just bounds past having a great time and looking very comfortable at about 7k...

Meanwhile, I'm concentrating on proper running, having to hold off the elite runners as I lead the race at about the same point, me being super speedy and all that...

[What do you mean, it looks like it's been PhotoShopped??]

And here's Charlie with his fab winning medal!

Oh, ok, fess up time. I didn't run. My knee is puffy (see first photo, left leg) and those hands doing high-fives with Charlie are mine... Sad or what? And it's not entirely a heroic story...

On the Mud Runner I twisted my knee at about 6.8k and thought I was a gonner, but about half a k walking seemed to fix it and I carried on... the next day my knee was stiff, but round the back, and it got worse through the week so on Friday I went for physio. I have, officially, the first known occurrence of hamstring injury caused by being the back end of a pantomime cow. Yes, still. 4 weeks after Cowgate. Am puffy-kneed. And sore. For good measure I have also twisted the patella and strained my iliotibial band. I'm working on the 'if I can spell it I can injure it' basis... So I was advised NOT to run, and to keep putting ice packs on the back of my knee, preferably whilst lying flat on the floor. Elegant or what? And a little off-putting for my office colleagues but, hey, they'll get used to it...

So, yes, the picture was PhotoShopped - the route went absolutely right past Charlie's house so Guy and I went out early and I pretended to run (only for about 6 steps, honest) and then I got cracking with the masking tool....

It was still a great day - Charlie really was amazing. No training, wearing a croc suit and STILL completed 10k in 48 minutes. Amazing! He was the first fancy dress runner to finish, well ahead of any competition - what a STAR! I am so proud of him... and slightly worried about the speed I'll have to be able to do next year when I am determined to have another crack at it...

It is also mooted that I should wear a similar croc outfit. And that my brother, Charlie's dad, should join us... I'd better get training, just as soon as the swelling goes down.

At the moment I'd be a crocked croc...

Posh photos, timings and speedy Sian

2011-05-13T20:25:00.005+01:00

This one might go a bit weird... I only understand computers in so far as they either 'work' or they 'don't work'. Blogger has been down for a whole day and so my evening spent sharing more news of Oblivion with you was, er, fruitless. However, I did save what I had written so that I could paste it in when Blogger was mended. Online. Whatever. But I expect the text will go a bit weird... And as I have Absolutely No Idea how to fix it, we'll stick with weird...

We've got proper posh photos - they're FAB! Huge thanks to all the photographers who sat patiently for several hours just clicking away. I did notice one of them was awfully muddy without even having had the fun of running through puddles... he must have been splashed by the passing troops...

Here's Ice Cream Sian at the first swamp - smiling but wonderfully upright:

This was the first serious mud - Fit Mark was miles ahead, but he yelled back 'SMILE' then came back to us to pose. Which was fine until I fell over sideways... The photographer kept clicking and I think Fit Mark said 'awesome' several times... I must have disappeared behind that very useful tree so the photos didn't come out...

And this is just after the big 'over or under' logs - because the water level was a bit lower than before, Ice Cream Sian and I were able to duck under the logs, whereas Fit Mark simply climbed over the top. And, again, as we approached the photographer, Fit Mark yelled 'SMILE' and 'THUMBS UP'. Us girls managed the smile bit...

And then I fell over ...

Again.

But, look - my lovely team-mates are on hand to haul me out. For the second time...

And here's Fit Mark climbing out of the first lake - see, he knows where the photographer is AGAIN. No sign of us in the background...

And this is smiling Ice Cream Sian climbing out of the same bit some time later... I'm within earshot (just) and do remember the photographer shouting out 'FABULOUS - LOVELY SMILE!' as she passed. I don't think he said anything to me. Maybe he couldn't think of suitable alternatives to 'knackered' and 'old'...

And this is Ice Cream Sian and me at the 'pull yourself up a very steep slippy hill using only a few knotted ropes while you're sopping wet having just waded through the first lake'. And we're STILL smiling! That's because we were rapidly catching up that guy disappearing out of the photo...

And then it's the FINISH - Fit Mark still smiling straight at the camera, and me a rather alarming shade of puce... You'll notice it's just a photo of Fit Mark and me:

That's because Ice Cream Sian was IN FRONT!!!

Some time this week (is it me, or have all the days just merged into each other since Oblivion...?) we received the accurate timings for our run. 2.06.33. Except for Ice Cream Sian who was 2.06.32 - SHE BEAT FIT MARK!!!! Obviously it was really close and he probably could have won if he'd gone a bit quicker on the way round and with good training he'll probably be up to Ice Cream Sian's speed next year. I expect he'll say he was hampered by trying to drag me through that sprint finish...

We could have had accurate timings earlier if I'd been better at managing my clever watch timing thingy - it got very muddy on the way round. So muddy that I couldn't see the face, and told the others I didn't have any bit of me dry enough to wipe it on. Which was when Fit Mark said 'Sian's dry...'

And then I was so thrilled at having actually GOT to the finish that I forgot to press 'stop' until after the picnic, after the drive home, and after emptying my running kit bag. So my official time, according to my own watch, is 4 hours, 21 minutes and 58 seconds.

Not quick, then...

Oblivion!

2011-05-08T19:49:00.006+01:00

At 1.30 this morning I was woken up by the rain lashing down and thought 'ok, very funny, it can stop now'. 6 dry weeks and then torrential rain for 2 days? Made for good mud though!

My birthday started brilliantly with lots of run-related pressies from Guy (a lot of them being Things For Dodgy Knees) gin and a necklace from Ice Cream Sian, and champagne and an absolutely fantastic birthday card from Fit Mark:

There must have been close to 1000 cars in the Deer Park at Eastnor Castle, but we managed to find each other - by this time it had stopped raining and the sun was coming out. Perfect!

And look how CLEAN we are. Please do look... it didn't last long!

The course started with a really, really long uphill... Ice Cream Sian and I managed about two thirds of it then gave up and walked - we'll admit now that Ice Cream Sian's achilles enforced lack of training and my stinking cold were not the best preparation...

After the long up there was a long down, then another up, then a down, then a swamp... Our first taste of being seriously muddy - brilliant! Fit Mark was well ahead of us, despite running as slow as he could, and yelled back to smile for the photographer. We did our best. In the early stages there wasn't space for spectators, but we think we've been caught on camera by the official sports photographers, so hopefully more photos later in the week... After the swamp there was another uphill and I was seriously wheezing by this time - or 'Darth Vader having an asthma attack' as Fit Mark put it. There was talk of forcibly retiring me, so I ignored them both and wheezed less...

The track was either slippery, or about hip deep in water - amazing! One of the huge muddy puddles had a cameraman on it, so Fit Mark came back into the water to pose with Ice Cream Sian and me for a photo - that should be a super photo. Or at least it was until I lost my footing and went SPLAT into the water - the cameraman loved it! Nice and cool though...

There were obstacles about every kilometre - climbing over telegraph poles, under telegraph poles in water, a series of four 6 foot high fences (and loads of people trying to climb over, the main thing to avoid was being kicked in the teeth by the person in front) and an incredibly complicated cats cradle construction over the deepest mud on the trail - I got one leg completely stuck in the mud and thought my trainer was going to come off, but thank goodness it just stayed put, with a fab sucking noise as it eventually came free...

There was a water station half way round with the lovely stewards and volunteers handing out water and Red Bull. Damned Fine Idea.

Fit Mark was seriously faster than us on the uphills, and also seriously faster than us on the downhills... This meant that he spent a lot of the race (can we call it a race when we took 20 minutes to do a mile?) waiting for us and peering back to see if we were in view...

Nope. We're nowhere in sight...

Ice Cream Sian and I were spectacularly muddy before we got to the two lakes at the end... We knew we were going to get cleaner, so we posed for a photo taken by Guy before we jumped in. I think it was cold - we were so hot by then it was just refreshing. If muddy...

And this is us crossing the second lake - look, all smiling!

To get out there was a large orange padded mat - Ice Cream Sian skipped up the left side and I was just eyeing up the knotted rope to climb out when Fit Mark came back, grabbed me and hauled me up. Probably just as well as I think I might still be there otherwise...

Then he grabbed both of us by the hands, yelled 'SPRINT FINISH' and set off like a train...

So we sprint finished! That's Guy on the left, with Rubbish Running Dog in her favoured 'nose down hunt the hamburger' pose which she adopts at large public events.

And that was it - we were handed medals as we finished, and tin foil blankets, and T shirts (yay!) We were filthy. Utterly filthy. And very, very happy! Fit Mark had disappeared to get changed by this time while Ice Cream Sian and I stood around saying 'we did it' over and over again.

And then it was birthday picnic time - in a warm sunny car park. In a Force 8 gale. Where did the wind come from? We had to hang on to cups, plates, bottles - well, everything really! Guy's quiche was great and our chocolate cake with chocolate icing had got squashed so it really did look like part of the mud run.

The Mud Runner was utterly brilliant! The camaraderie was great - everyone slipping, sliding and getting filthy together, shrieks as people fell over, nearby runners checking to see nobody was injured, three boys running as pink fairies, and a chap in a cow outfit (who passed us...) Ice Cream Sian smiled the whole way round (the photographers loved her) and we did finish the course. At a sprint.

Fit Mark's best insult? Telling Ice Cream Sian she went across a deep muddle like a Jesus Lizard, then changing his mind and saying 'Oh no, I meant a Jesus Hippo...'

Our time? Hmmm, 2 hours 8 minutes. Pretty rubbish, but the lack of recent training and the wheezing did for it... we'll be under 2 hours next year.

Oh yes, we've already decided we're doing it next year!

Rain! And banned substances...

2011-05-07T19:31:00.003+01:00

It's been raining! Both Ice Cream Sian and I woke up at 4.30 this morning (in separate houses - we're close, but not THAT close) thinking 'yay - rain!'. This is perfectly acceptable for me, but Ice Cream Sian should really be not liking rain on account of it not being ice cream weather and all that... but all we can think about is the MUD!

Wee Gill popped round with my birthday pressie this afternoon and I've opened it (I know, a day early - tomorrow might be kind of busy though) and I've got a 'Mud Run Survival Kit' with bubble bath, scrubbing mits, box of chocolate, nail brush, chocolate raisins (fruit - healthy), Haribo sweets (sugar - energy), a large comb (to get mud out of the hair), a mini hottie (for creaky knees), more chocolate (can't ever have too much) and a bottle of fizz for celebrating afterwards... fab or what? This is now a Two Day Birthday - excellent!

We've been making food for the picnic - slightly singed sausages (should have put the timer on, forget they were in the oven), quiche (Guy in charge, it'll be gorgeous) and a birthday cake which is chocolate, with chocolate 'mud' on top. Had to be done.

And, with spectacular timing, I have a bug... the works. Snotty nose, puffy eyes, bit of a cough, aching limbs (I know, before we've even started!) and absolutely no voice whatsoever. Haven't told Fit Mark yet because he might do himself an injury laughing... he's going to LOVE IT! not only does he get to poke fun at Ice Cream Sian and me, but I won't be able to answer back...

I've been to Boots and got decongestant tablets - I've found before that these, combined with paracetamol, ibuprofen, Lucozade and dark chocolate really cure pretty much anything. However, the chemist did say (and I like to think it was because I looked like an athlete, but he was probably just making conversation) that did I know these particular ones were a banned substance. Damn. Have to postpone the Olympic trials then. Gutted.

So, of course, the sensible thing would be not to run tomorrow.

Nah. Sensible is overrated...

Wee Gill's Big Race

2011-05-02T19:36:00.004+01:00

Yep, it was 2k with Rubbish Running Boss, except of course she's now getting rather good so has become Wee Gill. The race was in Cardiff Bay and we got there far too early so we drank water and did lots of stretching.

No we didn't, we went for coffee instead...

Then we were off to the start - we didn't know where it was so we just followed everybody else. That's 'everybody else' as in 'the four year olds and mums and dads'. Yep, all the other runners were under four foot tall and accompanied by proud parents...

This is Wee Gill at the start. Still smiling!

Wee Gill's previous best time was 7.30 for each kilometre, so she set the pace. At 6.20 per kilometre... Pretty quick! I thought I was keeping up with her. She thought she was keeping up with me... We kept going, sadly not across the barrage as I thought, but around the Millennium Centre where the roads had been closed but the traffic lights were still working and every time we got to a red one Wee Gill suggested we should stop... I tried the line of 'not far now' but she's got a clever watch thingy too and knew exactly how far we had to go.

Before long we were back under the start which, confusingly, was not the finish, and we were looking out for a similarly large inflated thingy for the Grand Finish, but there wasn't one. Then at 1.5k a goody bag and a medal got thrust at us in the middle of a crowd, and That Was That. Half a kilometre short? We agreed to keep going (OK, I said 'we'll go on' and Wee Gill was too puffed to disagree...) so we ran further round the Bay, avoiding pushchairs, people, bicycles and not even being distracted by the Mr Whippy Ice Cream Van. We carried on to 2k and stopped - 12.52 minutes! That's quicker by 2 minutes than Wee Gill's personal best!

And once she was able to breathe again I think she was quite pleased...

See - happy smiling Wee Gill! I think I'm still employed.

Then we had a bank holiday lunch sitting in the garden, glasses of wine and ice cream dessert at the parlour. Proper training!

Planning...

2011-04-30T20:45:00.007+01:00

We've had our EEEEEK meeting at the parlour with just a week to go. It's a great place to have an EEEEEK meeting - not only is there lovely scenery, but also ice cream, chocolate flake, cappuccino, hot chocolate and malt cake with creamy butter. Obviously it counts as 'training' as we were planning tactics (or 'how to get round' as we like to call it)... And we discussed our start time as the organisers have sent out details as follows:-

11.00 Wave 1 - Runners who can confidently run 10km in under 50 minutes (OMG - people can actually DO that??)

11.05 Wave 2 - Runners who can confidently run 10km in under 52 minutes

11.10 Wave 3 - Runners who can confidently run 10km in under 55 minutes (these are very accurate timings - we tend to go by the hour)

11.15 Wave 4 - Runners who can confidently run 10km in under 57 minutes

11.20 Wave 5 - Runners who can confidently run 10km in under 1hr (hooray, look - an hour!)

11.25 Wave 6 - Runners who can confidently run 10km in under 1hr 5 minutes

11.30 Wave 7 - Just happy to get round and complete the course. (YAY! We've found our wave at last!)

Then Fit Mark points out that there isn't a wave for us.... he reckons there should be another one:

11.35 Wave 8 - Lucky to get to the start.

What a wag, eh? Still, on the plus side, on his 'proper running' yesterday apparently he ran smack into a low branch which knocked him off his feet, Keystone Kops style, and put him on his back. And we missed it! Bummer... That'll teach him to go off 'proper running' on his own...

So we think we're all set. Obviously, being the Team Leader (actually, I'm not, that really has to be Fit Mark as he's the only one who has even the vaguest clue what we're doing) so, um, being the One Who Had The Idea Of Being a Team In The First Place (good, a snappy title, loving it) I made up team packs for my team mates...

Ice Cream Sian's bag had a team vest (I hope it fits), a big towelly thing to get dry and changed in afterwards (apparently we're going to get wet or muddy or something), a rubber car mat (to stand on when changing in big towelly thing), wet wipes (to get clean with), Lucozade sport (for energy), Jelly Babies (for more energy) and a bubble wand and party poppers for the party afterwards.

Fit Mark's bag had less in it because he's smart enough to already have a big towelly thing and a rubber car mat to stand on. So he got the team vest (which he says he'll try out tomorrow), wet wipes (also to get clean with), Jelly Babies (he doesn't need energy but it wouldn't have been fair not to give him some), beer (which he says he'll drink on the way round) and a bubble wand and party poppers for the party afterwards. Or on the way round, it depends how much time he has hanging around waiting for us to catch up once he's finished the beer...

So that's the Mud Runner sorted, apart from the running bit. And I've also been planning for the Bristol 10k on 15th May... I'm running with my nephew Charly who will be dressed as a crocodile. He rang today so we also discussed start times and run times. The line was bad but when I told him my expected time I could have sworn he said something about 'very slow' and 'run on ahead' and 'see you at the finish' but I probably misheard him. All I will say is that, Charly, if you abandon me, think carefully about 'Christmas' and 'presents' and 'Aunty Sarah'...

I promised I would find a suitable outfit to accompany a nephew dressed as a crocodile and I think I've got it sorted with this:

Don't worry about the sheep. It's a red herring...

Knees and ankles do 5k...

2011-04-29T18:48:00.004+01:00

Well, about 5k. 'About' as in, um, 10k... We were having fun, what can we say? It was 'Are your achilles alright?' 'Yes, fine, how are your knees?' for much of the way, and we did go VERY slowly... but at 3.5k it was either head for home or go on down the Tardis and admire the bluebells... So we did the Tardis although I walked a chunk of it as downhill is still a bit tricky...

On our way home we met a runner going the other way... spotted him from a distance in a bright red T shirt and, guess what? It was FIT MARK! Doing proper running! We all stopped for a chat and we showed him our 5k on my watch (at 6.8k at the time and still 3k from home...). Ice Cream Sian and I were quite happy having our chat, but Fit Mark wanted to get running again, so off he went, and we toddled off on our way home...

Do you know, we were SO FAST on the road that we actually set the speed warning light thingy off! Look, here's Ice Cream Sian pointing at it!

Or it could have been set off by the car going past...

It's all about the numbers...

2011-04-28T20:24:00.003+01:00

My lovely client today offered to give me a Reiki healing session for my birthday and said 'So, are you actually doing anything on your birthday?' 'Yes, the Oblivion 10k Mud Runner!' I said proudly.

'You're mad.' Just about sums it up, really...

My race number and timing chip (I hope it registers 'hours' and not just 'minutes') has arrived. I'm number 299. Just under three quid then...

My number is not only up for the Mud Runner on 8th May, but also...

A 2k race across Cardiff Barrage on 2nd May - it's a charity race with another of my clients who only started running 2 or 3 weeks ago so we decided it was a nice easy distance. She's got a watch distance recording thingy and was struggling with distance and time... except she had it clocking in miles, not kilometres, so she's nearly twice as far and twice as fast as she thought. She was going to be called Rubbish Running Boss but that hardly seems fair now... She'll have to be Wee Gill instead as she's Scottish and petite... So anyway, 2k on Monday. My race number has arrived - I'm 101. Twice my age...

And 10k on 15th May. I've entered the Bristol 10k Road Race. Because my nephew asked me to. I'm enormously proud to be his Running Aunt (actually that should be Rubbish Running Aunt) although I'm aiming for Quick Running Aunt. Charly is going to be wearing a crocodile outfit, so I'm hoping that will slow him down. Considerably. I will, naturally, be wearing something appropriate for the occasion... My race chip and number has just arrived for this one - I'm number 1662. Nearly the year I was born...

I've had more physio, I reek of Deep Heat, and Fit Mark sent me and Sian an email this morning addressed to 'my infirm and decrepit team mates'. Sounds about right. He also suggested we should seek sponsorship from WD40. Ho Ho Ho. He's off doing 'proper runs' this weekend, while Sian and I plan to have a gentle 5k tomorrow and see if any ankles, knees or achilles drop off. We do hope not...

And then we'll have an EEEEEK meeting at the weekend. With just a week to go...

2 weeks to go...

2011-04-25T19:56:00.005+01:00

The Mud Runner is two weeks yesterday. EEEEK! Ice Cream Sian still isn't running, Fit Mark has been whooping it up in Devon for Easter, and I appear to have eaten my own body weight in chocolate...

Still, on the plus side, I did 5k yesterday with no lasting ill effects - I stuck to Steve the Physio's advice and ran laps round a nice big grassy field. I did confuse John the Farmer just a bit - he arrived to feed the 200 or so sheep in the field and followed me round in his Landrover for a bit to see where I was trying to get to - I stopped for a chat and he asked if I was training for a marathon. Does he think I'm mad?! I explained about triathlons and he now definitely thinks I'm mad...

I thought I'd give the knees a rest today so I swam a mile and then Guy and I went out on the bikes - still getting used to the cleats, and the bike still wants to go faster than I do. We went 14k, ending up at the ice cream parlour for coffee and ice-cream... I managed not to fall off the bike this time (hooray), but Guy kept up the tradition by not getting his foot out of the pedal quick enough and toppling over sideways...

And we're getting ready for the Oblivion Mud Runner - I'm planning the party in the car park, we're having a Last Minute Eeek Meeting next weekend, and we have T shirts ready to go...

Fab or what? Huge thanks to Gareth the Sign for fab printing.

I've also been planning events beyond the Mud Runner - aiming at the Tri For Life again, only this time it's in July. I figure if I cycle 3 times a week, swim 3 times a week and run 3 times a week that should do it nicely. If I do one sport each day and have one rest day a week it'll be fine.

10 day week, anyone?

Twangs and creaks...

2011-04-22T14:23:00.004+01:00

I tried a bit of a run on Monday night with Rubbish Running Dog and I knew I was in trouble when she was faster than me... I couldn't decide which knee hurt more, and it's actually quite tricky limping on two legs at once... so I booked a physio appointment.

Steve the Physio took one look and said 'it's the knees isn't it?' which pretty much sums it up, although this time, just to get my money's worth, I added a dodgy left ankle in too... The knees ache at the front and feel like there's a tight elastic band at the back which is a Whole New Ache...

'Have you been stretching forward at all?'

'Yes'.

'Well, that's how you did it. What were you doing?'

'I was the back half of a pantomime cow.'

Laugh? Oh yes. Till he cried...

We agreed the knee backs would recover in time, the knee fronts need physio and he'd do my ankle for good measure - apparently running on the sides of hills and turning it over was what did for that. Then he advised I could still run if I found a nice soft field with no sideways slope.

I've already worked out I can get to the top of Rudry common avoiding hard bits and sideways slopey bits, so should be able to manage at least 8k some time this long weekend.

This morning I tried out the exercise bike (knees still hurt, but it was 5k before I decided that they Really Hurt) then swimming, which was also painful - my favoured breaststroke resulted in 'creak' (right knee), 'twang' (left knee) and breathe, creak, twang, breathe.... not great, so I tried crawl, which I'm not so strong at - creak, twang, swallow water, creak, twang, splutter, creak, twang, sink... so I got out.

I'm now sitting on the sofa with the laptop after doing my physio exercises and I've got bags of frozen peas on both knees and my left ankle. Sorted!

After swimming I also decided it would be sensible to anoint my feet with 'intensive foot softener' to help the blisters. It made my feet kind of greasy and I slid off my sandals.

And turned my left ankle...

I'm too old... it's official!

2011-04-18T19:29:00.004+01:00

Very sad news, everyone. I am Too Old. Officially. Oh yes...

Last night I was hunting on the internet for a new running top. Like the one I've got, only a size smaller - I must have shrunk (yay!) I found the right top in the right size at a few places and went for the best deal - at My Triathlon. They wanted all the usual stuff about name, address, date of birth, etc... It was fine until the date of birth. It had one of those long lists of years and I scrolled back, and back, and back, saying to Guy 'you know you're old when you have to keep scrolling on and on' and then I came to the end. 1961. So it didn't even go back as far as my year - 1960.

So that's it. I'm officially Too Old!

Obviously I decided to take my business elsewhere... But then the other website crashed, so I had to go back and LIE. I was born in 1961, apparently...

Now if I was in the US I would clearly sue them. For hurt feelings, damage to reputation, feelings of obsolescence, etc etc. I do have access to about 40 splendidly litigious lawyers (don't they know I'm a legal secretary?) and my cousin in America works out damages for people in law suits... But I'm not that vengeful, I'll settle for an 'I'm sorry' pair of socks (100 Mile Marfil Trisock, womens, small, pink please).

To be fair, I did email My Triathlon and say 'shame on you' and I had a lovely response from Steve saying 'oh that's terrible, I was born in 1960 too, our sport is for any age, I'll get it changed immediately' which is about all he could say (apart from the thing about the socks).

So I shall shuffle back to my bath chair, wrap my tartan rug around my knees and leave you with this picture that Fit Mark took on Saturday. I mean, really, does this look like an Old Person?

Yes, ok, fair point...

Blisters and sabotage

2011-04-17T17:58:00.007+01:00

On Wednesday of last week I had an appointment in Machen (2k away). So I ran there very quickly, and then ran home very quickly afterwards. On Thursday my knees and my left ankle were complaining, so much so that I thought 'ok, be sensible, don't run, rest up, do exercises, treat with ice packs, get better, then train'. At which point a text pops up from Fit Mark: 'Fancy 12k on Saturday morning?' So what did I respond? "Yay, 12k, FAB thanks!'.

So at 7.30 on Saturday morning we set off. No Ice Cream Sian - she's still 'under the physio' but hoping to be back running gently this week... Fit Mark gave me a choice of two 12k (ish) routes - either the Tardis ++ or 'Bluebell Hill'. I chose Bluebell Hill. Perhaps I wasn't paying attention enough, and to be fair he did say later that 'the clue was in the title' but all I heard was 'bluebell' and not 'hill'. My mistake...

We set off and made it to the top of Rudry Common without stopping (yay - couldn't do that 3 weeks ago!) then we had to get on to the top of a large bank - Fit Mark leapt up easily, and yelled back 'come on, just leap like a gazelle', so I speeded up and leapt, thinking 'elegant, graceful, powerful'. He said I looked more like a gnu... Or, sticking with animals beginning with G, a gibbon. Hmph.

Some hills later we began to go down. And down, and down... We were running down the other side of Caerphilly Mountain. And it's a long way. Which meant that at some point we would have to go back up again... Anyway, before long we did arrive at the bluebells, just at the top of Llanishen Golf Club. WOW. WOW. And WOW. Last week's were good, this week's were spectacular... a pure carpet of blue...

After stopping to take photos (always a good excuse for a break) we were off again. Still running alongside the golf course. There are, apparently, Things You Shouldn't Yell When Running Past A Golf Course As It Puts Off The Golfers. Things such as:

'Aaaarrggghh this is really steep!' and

'Oh WOW those are AMAZING!' and

'What am I supposed to JUMP this?' and

'This is FANTASTIC!'

To be fair, I didn't yell all of them. Well, not all at once...

We then passed an older bloke in running gear. Probably not a lot older but he did have a grey moustache. I thought 'aw, bless, he's stretching as he's old' and 'maybe he's a beginner' as we jogged past him. After another few hundred yards there were footsteps behind and, yep, he sped past me. As he caught up with Fit Mark they started chatting 'Yes, she's doing her first 12k, well, 13 really but I haven't told her yet. What races do you do?' and off they went, running faster than me while chatting happily. Once they were out of sight I had a breather. Well, pointless to waste the chance...

Soon Grey Moustache whizzed off on his own, and Fit Mark waited for me, which was just as well as I was pretty much lost... Then it was uphill, and more uphill, then more uphill. Then woods, a field I recognised and YAY - 12k! At Ice Cream Sian's house! 1k from my house! So we ran home - 13k! If my feet hadn't been so sore I probably would have jumped up and down in excitement... I discovered the most enormous blisters under each of my big toes. Ouch! So I now need not so thin socks...

On Saturday afternoon I decided that what I really needed to do was some strengthening exercises because I want to be ready for whatever the Mud Run is going to chuck at us... So, back strengthening exercises. Any ideas?

Well, this seemed like a good idea...

Yep, that's me in the back. And my VERY good friend Becky in the front - she volunteered and she had previous experience. What's not to love?? There was actually a reason for this - it was the Official Grand Opening of Ice Cream Sian's Ice Cream Parlour, complete with Mayor in his ceremonial chain cutting a ribbon and all that... Becky was brilliant with the children - she made moo noises, posed for photos, and we even danced (sort of) when Guy played the melodeon... I just followed her backside and looked at people's feet.

And we posed for a new team photo:

You're right, it is the wrong end. I would have pointed this out but as all I could see were feet I didn't know it had been done until, well, it had been done....

Then this morning we went back up to the parlour to help tidy up, only it had all been done, so we had breakfast instead. Which is where the sabotage comes in...

Does this look like 'salad and an isotonic drink please' to you?

She's definitely trying to slow me down...

Team, time and Tardis

2011-04-10T19:32:00.004+01:00

Well, there's GOOD NEWS on the team front - Fit Mark was away whooping it up at a wedding in Devon so was out of radio contact (well, it was Devon...) but is back, is well and is fine. Ice Cream Sian has had a physio session and reckons she'll be able to run this coming Tuesday. So we have Grand Plans for 6pm. Yay! A team again! Albeit one still absent (now on mountain bike weekend), one still limping (but under the physiotherapist, so to speak) and one still training on its own.

On Thursday after work I decided to repeat our very first training run, all on my little ownsome, so off I set on the first mud run we ever did with Fit Mark. Weirdly, I could recall all his insults most of the way round... Our original time was 1.06.56. This time (without stopping - I must be improving) it was just 56.47. That's a WHOPPING 10 minutes off! Yay! Mind you, there was a problem... I'm still wearing my extra padded socks. My feet were boiling. And, by the time I got to the river near home, they felt like they were going to explode. I haven't had that since I spent 12 hours standing on concrete in heels at The Ashes in Cardiff (I was working - even I'm not dumb enough to go to a cricket match in heels...) Anyway, when I splashed through the river I stopped and stood in a deep bit - bliss.... Then as I set off I couldn't decide whether it was water splashing in my drinking bottle or my feet squelching which was making the loudest noise...

Once I got home, there was only one thing for it...

And just LOOK at the colour of that water...

And then on Saturday I decided to do the Tardis. Again. Mainly because I got the wrong route at the end last time, and the downhill bit was a different way home so I thought I'd try again and concentrate this time... And here's the weird thing - I decided not to 'chase the time' but to just enjoy it, so I ran the whole way, didn't stop even in the steep bits, and made it home exactly 4 seconds slower than when I did it with Fit Mark. 4 seconds! After 1 hour and 22 minutes... Spooky. Either I'm getting into a rhythm or it's a coincidence. I think it's coincidence...

Anyway, just so those of you who have pavements to run on can be jealous, this is the Tardis in the sunshine this weekend:

And, no, I didn't stop to take the photo - when I told Guy how beautiful it was he got me to drop him and Rubbish Running Dog off at the bottom of the Tardis on our way back from shopping and he walked home, taking pics on the way. Bluebells and wood anemones - isn't it gorgeous?

And that's pretty much been training this week... unless you count getting dressed up for a Wild West night out, saying 'yee-hah' a lot and line dancing...

Yep, it's a pink wig. My stetson was too big without it...

Team? What team?

2011-04-03T18:14:00.003+01:00

Having arrived back sunkissed and relaxed (well, 'relaxed' is a relative term thanks to the Thomson check-in desks at Arrecife airport but let's not go there right now) I decided that the only thing to reasonably do was RUN! Ice Cream Sian and I arranged that I would show her the Tardis on Tuesday, so we were all set.

Then she texted to say that her Achilles was a lot worse, she'd taken advice, she'd made a physio appointment and, in the meantime, no running... So, it's raining, it's cold, I'm tired, I want to go home to bed... what do I do? Yep, I do the Tardis on my own...

I discover two things: (1) it's not nearly as much fun without Mark making rude comments and (2) if you have Lucozade Lite in your water bottle and it leaks you get sticky.

I don't know if it was the change in altitude (volcanos being at sea level and all that) but I really struggled... I was, however, hell-bent on beating the previous week's time, and managed it (just) by one minute. Well, 61 seconds if we're being picky. [Note: Yes, you're right, if it had been 59 seconds I would have called it 'one minute'. I am well aware of this].

Anyway (and this is entirely for the benefit of Fit Mark) - here's the proof. YAY!

The '6.53' relates to my time for the last kilometre. Yes, I was shifting. And, yes, I was very puffed.

By this time (Wednesday) I'm beginning to get a little worried about Mark... I've had no texts or emails from him since before I ran the volcano. He was sweet enough to read the blog about my plan to run it and send an email saying 'having read your blog somehow I doubt you'll do it'. See - insults across the Atlantic... Anyway, after doing it I sent him a triumphant 'Oh ye of little faith' email with the pic of me at the top... and nothing. No email, no text, no insult... And still no word, so I am now Officially Worried.

Sian is not running until she's seen the physio, although she does say that she's now exceptionally good at 'policeman exercises' where you go up and down on your heels to stretch your Achilles. She can even do this when serving ice-cream. Multi-tasking or what?

Today being Sunday, I decided to run anyway, despite the lack of team-mates. Guy and I were heading for the farmers' market in Cardiff, so I devised A Cunning Plan. On the way back he dropped me off the other side of Caerphilly Mountain from home, and I ran back.

See, this is happy cheerful me pointing at the way up:

Actually it looks like Slightly Concerned me looking at the way up...

I set off and follow a footpath at the bottom of the steep bit of the hill. This invitingly goes up through woodland and then, not so invitingly, heads back down in the direction of where I've just come. No thanks - if I go down, I'll have to go up again. I look at the hill, and look at the footpath. Enough looking - just run up the hill. So that's what I do... Just straight up a nice grassy field, across a post and rail fence at the top, across another field and then I'm on The Ridgeway - a path we've run before, although I'm a couple of miles further along it than last time... According to my clever watch, my total climb in the first kilometre is 147 metres. Yep, that's about what it felt like.

I jog along wondering why I'm going so slowly. I pass walkers, mountain bikers, and a very odd looking bloke with a long stringy pony tail who runs with his chin to the sky - looks uncomfortable. But he's going significantly quicker than me! Maybe I should try it...

Eventually I stop going 'uphill', go flattish for a bit, and then start downhill. And it's then that I realise I have a problem. Every time my left foot hits the ground my shin and my knee scream. And every time my right foot hits the ground my hip and my knee hurt. This is because I haven't been doing my knee exercises (what can I say - I forget!). So what to do? Carry on and risk injury? Wimp out and limp home? Or REALLY wimp out and call Guy for a lift?

Yep, I call Guy...

So, the team is currently: One who needs to do knee exercises, one who needs to get an Achilles sorted, and one who is worryingly absent...

As Ice Cream Sian says, all good chick lit needs a happy start, a crisis in the middle and then an 'it's all going to be fine' ending.

Let's hope for that then...

Sarah and the Volcano - again

2011-03-27T16:19:00.004+01:00

Yep, it had to be done... not at the run, this time, but walking back up the volcano with Guy - it didn't seem right that he hadn't been able to see the spectactular crater and, to be fair, it was his idea...

So off we went again - just the day after my run, so my knees were still whingeing a bit. The day was much cooler, and with gale force winds - we were in danger of being blown off the ridge at the top.

As we were going at a more sedate pace (although, fairly honestly, not actually a lot slower than my running) we were able to take more pics...

This one shows the extraordinary Lanzarote custom of building towers out of stones - no glue, no props, just stones balanced on top of each other. These are all over Lanzarote, and some are better than others. I guess there's just nothing else to do in this landscape...

And we did make it to the top again, despite the wind - you can't really tell from this but Guy was frantically hanging on to the water bottle as it would have blown away otherwise. I had, for the same reason, stuffed my funky hat down my shorts... Yep, even on a volcano I can do elegant...

And this is what the crater looks like. Big. Very big. And surprisingly green inside, given the brownness of the outside. There was a couple posing for photos at the bottom of the crater - they were there when we arrived at the edge, there while we walked all the way round and still there when we left. We couldn't really see them clearly but either the lichen on the rock they were standing next to was way too exciting to leave or they were taking enough pictures of each other's woolly jumpers to illustrate an entire pamphlet of knitting patterns...

And then we had to go back down again... still slippy. I whirled my arms like a helicopter a few times, and we both slid a bit, but we made it without breaking anything. The down bit really isn't as much fun as going up, so much so that I said I wasn't going to run up the volcano again. This year. By next year I'll have forgotten how tricky coming down was... and I might be able to improve on my time... Or, better yet, I'll have won the lottery and be able to hire a helicopter to pluck me off the top once I've arrived there. Sorted!

Just to keep up the exercise regime, we also swam in the Atlantic (warmer than the hotel swimming pool and good 'open water' training for upcoming triathlons) and swam a mile a day in the freezing pool...

And ate too much.

Sarah and the Volcano

2011-03-25T10:13:00.003Z

So, it's Thursday evening, the hottest day of the year so far (apparently) and I'm off to run up a volcano. Guy takes a picture outside our hotel room of me pointing happily at my destination - presumably so that he has a nice photo of me in case I don't make it back... I have water, I have a funky hat (another free gift from the hotel) and a bit of paper with my name and Guy's phone number in case I pass out from heat exhaustion and get carted off to the nearest hospital...

No excuses, and no reasons not to go then. Eek.

We've already had a look at my route - we've seen people walking up to the top (although we've not seen anyone running yet) so I know where I'm going - down the road, across a wooden footbridge (well, sort of - it's not something that Caerphilly Council would be particularly proud of, but it's sturdy and it sort of works)

and up into the foothills. Are they called foothills when it's a volcano? Or just 'lower ash stuff'? Anyway, it's really slippy, so when I put my foot down it immediately slides back 3 or 4 inches. I'm going to be running further than I thought...

I make progress up the hill. Sort of slow progress - it's incredibly steep, very slippy and I keep stopping to text Guy where I am so he can wave.

I make it to the wooden cross remarkably quickly - it's not for fallen tourists, it's for something else, and there is writing on it, but I immediately forget what it says, despite wanting to remember.

The top ridge of the volcano is like a knife edge - incredibly rocky, very slippy and scarily steep on both sides. It's the first time I've ever been up close and personal with a volcano, and it's remarkable. There are three Germans ahead of me, pausing to look at the crater. As I run past the bloke says 'schnell, schnell!' which means 'quick, quick!'. Oh hah, very funny. Still, I'm having more fun than him - one of his companions is quite the meanest looking woman I've ever seen. And they've still got to go all the way back down...

I teeter along the top ridge to the very topmost point. And wave to Guy. Who I can't really see, so I wave at a small white blob in front of the hotel and hope that it's him. He only knows I'm at the top because I've texted, but he thinks he can see a black blob, so he waves back. Binoculars would be handy.

There's a concrete pillar to mark the top, and also a handy passer by. Theo is from Germany, he's about 20, wearing scruffy shorts and filthy trainers, and he's just climbed up the straight face of the volcano rather than taking the path. I ask him to take my photo and he duly obliges...

I also take a piccy of the view, just because it's so damned HIGH up there...

Theo asks which way I came up, and I point back along the jagged knife edge. He says he's running back down, so we could run together. I tell him I'm slow, and he seems ok with that. He then points out a much better route around the other side of the crater which is flatter, so we head off that way. About half way round he sees where he is staying and says he'll take a short cut, so he goes straight back down the volcano. He's clearly mad - it's incredibly slippery and entirely covered in loose volcanic lava.

I carry on round the crater and get back to the original path up... where I can't run any more. Not, for once, because I'm out of puff, but because it's simply too dangerous. Going down takes way longer than going up, and it's really hard on the legs. I pass the hilarious German man and his lemon faced companion, then I'm back to flatter ground - I take a slight detour to get on better roads and avoid the slippery stuff, and then I'm back on the long straight road to the hotel.

Going up was exactly 3k and took 36 minutes - not bad for such a steep climb. My clever watch has analysed the climb like this:

Yep, that's what a volcano looks like in profile. Funny, I thought it would be steeper... Weird how the graph shows 100m below sea level. What's that all about? Diving?

My total run including my detour on the way back was only 7k (Fit Mark, notice that - ONLY 7k!!) and it was absolutely brilliant.

So now I'm tempted to see if I can do it again. Only faster...

Because it's there...

2011-03-23T19:43:00.005Z

So, here we are in Lanzarote for warm weather training. Somehow we have got ourselves upgraded to a posher room and Free Stuff on tap - free food, free limitless drink and free extras like posh restaurants... Nope, no idea how that happened, but very nice it is too...

It is, however, playing havoc with the training regime. I've gone from the first day (late Sunday) to 'no, one glass is fine and I won't have dessert' to 'is there anything left in that bottle and I can't choose between the trifle and the tiramisu so I'll just have both' in 3 days. Heaven only knows what I'll be like by Sunday. The only teensy speck of hope is that the (free) wine in the restaurant really is like paint-stripper and two glasses is absolutely limits. Well, so far... who knows, with a bit of training?

And the seriously good news is that there is A Hill opposite the hotel.

If I could do funky graphics like Fit Mark and his '10.6k!!!' from last weekend there would be an arrow off to the left saying 'hotel' and an arrow off to the right saying 'track'. This is apparently Mt. Roja which I know, from my rudimentary grasp of Spanish to be pronounced 'Roger' and it's bang opposite the hotel. It's a volcano. Or what's left of one now that it's stopped erupting. [Note to self: check that it has stopped erupting before setting off]. The local map says it's 167. 167 whats I'm not entirely sure, but we'll go for metres... Hah, bigger than The Tardis then... And my plan is to run up it.

We've done a scout around to find the best route up (er, there's only one) and I'll either attempt it early in the morning or later in the day. Thursday or Friday. Really definite on the arrangements, then... Guy will stay in the hotel and take a piccy when I arrive at the top. The ground is volcanic (get away - that'll be because it used to be a volcano) and really loose, so stones in trainers could be a hazard, as could slipping and sliding all 167 metres back down again.

Slightly worryingly there is a wooden cross half way up the steepest ascent. Corpses of would be runners? Ex-tourists?

So, watch this space for news of the climb. On Thursday. Or Friday.

Depending on the consumption of paint stripper....

It's all about the distance...

2011-03-20T13:47:00.003Z

We had our customary early morning start - 7.45am. It is rather lovely running past houses knowing that other people haven't even got up yet. Well, ok, that would usually be me at the weekend... Ice Cream Sian can't make our run because she has just got Too Much On with children and Eisteddfods and parlours and Stuff, so it's just Fit Mark and me. Fit Mark turns up complete with rucksack - oh great, I'm so slow he's now bringing luggage ... He says it's his liquid pack to drink from - sort of tube effort that means he doesn't have to stop to drink (hell, that's one of my best reasons for stopping!) He says he's surprised that I haven't brought a drink as we're running further than ever before. Bummer - didn't think of that...

He has said that this will be a 9k run ending up at Ice Cream Sian's house. Except she's not with us, so we'll run straight past it back to mine - that'll be 10k then. Eek. He says it's 'mostly flat'. We live in the Welsh valleys - 'flat' is a relative term...

We set off along the valley and it is 'mostly flat'. It's lovely - blue sky, green soft grass, gentle primroses and a happy smiling Sarah...

Fit Mark says he has a surprise for me - I guess at 'armchair', 'downhill' or 'wading across a river' but I'm wrong on all counts. Just after 4k we stop to go through a gate (tip of the week: pretend you can't open it - really good for at least 10 seconds breather) he tells me to open up his rucksack - he's brought me a drink! Aw, bless...

And then I find out why... just after 5k we turn up a concrete drive which leads to a very steep hill through woodland. It is uphill for exactly 1k. And it climbs 100m. Good grief! That's a 10% hill then!

Early promise of bluebells, a whiff of wild garlic, blue sky, soft leaves underneath and a wheezing gurning Sarah...

And yes, I did take my pink top off whilst running up the hill - it distracted me for at least 20m while I got it stuck on my head... Fit Mark christened the hill The Tardis - because it's bigger than it looks. Actually, it looked pretty big.

After The Tardis anything else was a doddle - down a bit, up a bit, along a bit, down through muddy forests, across fields, stream and back down the fields to home... discussions included beer, beer and, er, beer.

And we did it! 10k! Actually, as you'll see from the clever watch thingy - 10.06k! Yay! So of course Fit Mark took a picture - with added graphics!

Rather astonishingly, the time was 1.22 (that's one HOUR 22 mins), just 2 minutes slower than last week's 8.6k. Amazing. Not quite sure how that happened, except that it was 'mostly flat'.

And this is me celebrating my first 10k! I was SO pleased... And look, still upright!

Obviously now I'm a proper runner I have to do serious training, so I'm currently on my way to Lanzarote for warm weather training... or 'holiday' as Guy puts it. We've left the house-sitters looking after my mud running boots and the animals, but I have packed trainers, swimsuit and running gear...

There's rather a fine hill opposite the hotel...

Guy says he'll take a picture from his lounger...

New running kit...

2011-03-18T17:47:00.003Z

And here we have Ice Cream Sian modelling the new team strip - Fit Mark, you're going to look just fabulous, dahling...

Oh, OK then... Ice Cream Sian was promoting Red Nose Day at the parlour and looked simply FABULOUS! I particularly liked the sparkly tiara... To get into the spirit of things I ordered a hot chocolate and a Red Nose Cup Cake - delicious! I probably should have had a celery stick and a piece of lean turkey to keep the diet and fitness on track but, hey, this was for charity...

And we have The Plan from Fit Mark for tomorrow - it's a 9k run. What happened to 8k? Last week 7k, this week 8k, next week 9k... Nope, 8k has just vanished... And The Run (which Fit Mark has cheerfully called 'Training Run 4 - The Distance Strikes Back') finishes at Ice Cream Sian's house which is 1k from home so actually it's 10k...

Gulp.

Rubbish Running Dog.... Improves!

2011-03-15T10:03:00.003Z

Yep, she's getting better... unlike me! This morning Rubbish Running Dog and I went out early with me fully expecting to run a bit, walk a bit, run a bit and then wait for her to catch up. She was right behind me all the way and even, shock horror, in front of me! Rubbish Running Dog is now sometimes faster than me...

This is a REALLY steep hill - which doesn't even look like a hill in the photo. I told Rubbish Running Dog I was racing her up the hill - and I won! Yay! Probably because she stopped to Have A Good Sniff Of Something Dead in the field, and I didn't...

So I'm now officially Only Just Faster Than Rubbish Running Dog.

As long as she stops for a sniff....

Training Run 3... the jumping one

2011-03-14T17:37:00.001Z

Fit Mark had kindly worked out another route for us, increasing the distance again. This time his midweek email said 'I'm not going to sugar-coat it [does he ever?] this one is quite tough with a couple of nasty climbs' And it was 7k...

Because I'd been out on Friday night the others kindly agreed to run on Sunday instead. However, Ice Cream Sian forgot (a) that she was out on Saturday night and (b) that she had two events to attend with ice cream on Sunday. So whilst it was good for me, Ice Cream Sian felt a bit rough and had a busy day ahead... I ran from home to Ice Cream Sian's, across the fields and the stream - it's always good to get the feet wet early!

Fit Mark was right about the uphill stuff - directly uphill from Ice Cream Sian's house for about 2k, by which time we were absolutely shattered. He was, as usual, bouncing on ahead in normal Tiggerish fashion. One day I'll be that fit...

Then it flattened out a bit and we were running through woods, deep puddles and really fun muddy bits. Brilliant! Fit Mark was again appointed Official Photographer and at some point (I'm not quite sure how) ended up behind me. I told him to photograph our backsides at his peril... 'Too late' came the cheerful reply 'I've already done it and, hey, I didn't know this thing had a wide angled lens'.... Ooh!

After the fun stuff there was more uphill - this time a VERY long incline and although we took a photo, it looks flat. So I'm not putting that photo in as you'll all think we're wimps! At the top we arrived at a track called The Ridgeway which kind of implies it's at the top, and apparently there's a fantastic view of Cardiff... I think I was too busy catching my breath to notice!

I did manage to grab a quick shot of Fit Mark looking calm, fit and not in the least puffed before we set off again:

After some more deep mud (tip: avoid the steaming bits - they're cow pats) at last we were going downhill. I ended up in front but Mark was determined to get past me (not difficult) and yelled 'Careful - you don't want to slip and fall - at least, not before I'm in position to get the shot!' My, how we laughed...

This is a bit of where we went - we had run along the top of that green field on the horizon, then through the woods on the left, down past the houses, into the valley and up again. The dot is one of either Ice Cream Sian or me... hard to tell from this distance, which was where Fit Mark was. He said he kept thinking he'd gone deaf, but then realised he was just so far ahead he could no longer hear us wheezing... It was a good week for insults!

Once we were going downhill I got a little over enthusiastic and leapt over a horse jump next to the track. Yay! Yes, ok, it's pretty small...

As we were getting near to Ice Cream Sian's house Fit Mark said we'd have a sprint finish - 'from that puddle to the gate' and both he and Ice Cream Sian went off like rockets. Blimey! I seem to be determinedly one-paced, so I stuck at my one pace and joined them some time later... then Fit Mark and I ran home again. I'd done some maths - if it was 1.4k to Ice Cream Sian's house from mine, and we were heading for just over 8k on the run (including the bit back to home) then I only needed to make it to 8.6k for it all to add up to 10k. Which would be amazing... So I ran up and down the lane outside home for a bit until I got to 8.6k. HOORAY!

Or, at least, it would have been HOORAY if it really was 1.4k to Ice Cream Sian's house. It isn't. It's only 1.1k . So my total distance was, er, 9.7k.

No wonder I never made it as an accountant...

I can do elegant....

2011-03-12T18:47:00.003Z

Last night was The Big Do... I got to have a bath, paint my toenails and wear a Posh Frock. Guy said I looked lovely (which was good) and then added that the scratches on my legs didn't even show (also good, but not right up there in the compliments stakes).

Yes, it's a very dark photo. I'm better in a dark photo...

And I really don't know why I was worried about how my legs would look after the last training run.

They were fine. Absolutely fine.

Running weekend...

2011-03-06T16:40:00.004Z

Saturday

It's 8am, it's frosty (or 'only minus three' as Fit Mark happily puts it) and we're off for our second proper training run. We're starting at Ice Cream Sian's house this time as, according to our route planner (Fit Mark) it's 1.5k nearer 'the fun stuff'. Because it's so frosty there really isn't much mud around. But the hills are still there... This time we're uphill, then uphill, then uphill a bit more, through some spectacular woods, down a bit, then uphill again.

This photo shows (a) what fantastic scenery we have and (b) just how far Fit Mark was ahead after we appointed him Official Photographer. I'm the pink dot, and Ice Cream Sian is the blue dot...

And here's one where we actually got within range. As we approached and the shutter clicked, Fit Mark yelled 'that's great you look like you're actually moving!' which we thought was pretty good. Then he said he'd tell everyone he PhotoShopped it... He also pointed out that we had only done 2 miles in the first 30 minutes, which he called 'the walking pace of a toddler'. I'm sure we were quicker than that...

I was oddly struggling for the first 5.5k - I blame it on a shop-bought oven-ready meal and the sloe gin the night before - Guy had been out and I thought I'd have a lazy evening. That'll teach me... chronic indigestion overnight and a distinct sluggishness until my digestive system gave up fighting (at about 5.5k) and running became fun again.

As it was a different route, Ice Cream Sian and I spent most of the way saying 'is that the back of Caroline's farm?' or (more often) 'where are we again?' We named many of the places we passed so that we could plan future routes - The Rudry Dung Heap (it steams), The See-Saw Stile (it wobbles), Wuthering Heights (high rocky bit, obviously) and The Cricket Field. This last one so named because when I went out with Guy last week we were in this field and I said I was getting cold - he kindly said not to worry about walking with him and to run on home and keep warm. As I was about to disappear from view over the brow of the hill I looked back to see him happily engrossed in the World Cup Cricket commentary on his portable radio... Consideration, pah!

After the woody bits and the fieldy bits there were more foresty bits - quite wiggly and, er, foresty. And this is Ice Cream Sian and me at the end - oddly we've both adopted the Posh Spice On Red Carpet One Hip Dropped pose. Seems we went to the same finishing school or something...

There isn't a picture of Fit Mark at the end. He looked just the same as at the beginning. Only colder... We left Ice Cream Sian at her house and Fit Mark and I carried on running home - total run of 8k! Exactly! It was only exactly because we did a funny S shape in the last field to make sure we made it all the way to 8k...

Brilliant run (well, after the first 5.5k) and not too worn out afterwards. I do, however, have a teensy problem. I must have hit a bramble somewhere as this is what my legs looked like after our run...

Which is fine, but on Friday of this week I have to wear my poshest frock to a posh frock dinner. With bare legs. And a slit at the back. Eek! But it's ok, I'll have had a bath by then...

Sunday

Just for added punishment, this morning I completed the British Military Fitness St Davids Day 5k run for charity in Bute Park, behind Cardiff Castle. You'll remember that the last 5k run I did there was actually 4.4k, but I was pretty sure this one would measure 5k, being military and all that. And yep, it did! The plan had been that Ice Cream Sian and I would run it together, but she had to open the parlour, so it was just me - and no Guy to hold my jumper as he was off playing melodeon for Morris dancers, so really really just me. I put my phone and a credit card in my back pocket with my car key, and that was it.

I ran the whole way, not stopping at all, which is pretty much the first time that's happened, so I must be improving. If only a bit. I was still beaten by a bloke in a large furry red dragon outfit. He beat me by so much that when I gasped my way over the line he had already removed his head, drunk his bottle of water and given a few interviews.

Still, I was pleased with my time - 33.12. Personal Best! Yay! And my last kilometre was sub-6 minutes for the first time ever. Not by much. Well, only by one second to tell the truth, but that still counts as sub-6 minutes. Hooray!

As I passed the finish line I was asked for my number, my safety pins and my ankle strap timing device. I presume the bloke who asked for them was something to do with the race, but I'm not entirely sure... Having been given my goody bag (T shirt, water, medal, lollipop and one of those slightly odd rubber bracelet thingies) I realised there was no reason to hang around, so I set off on Stage Two of Sunday - a quick trip to John Lewis. So I ran there (1.5k). Well, I was dressed for it... I arrived before 11am and had to hang around, lowering the tone nicely in my slightly hot and sticky running stuff. I was, by this time, wearing my St Davids Day 5k Fun Run T-shirt very proudly.

I also bought some perfume (it'll be nice to smell of something other than Deep Heat for Friday night) and a suitcase. Then I ran back to the car - another kilometre.

When I got home I took Rubbish Running Dog out for a walk (4k) and went to the ice cream parlour to show Ice Cream Sian my T shirt and medal, just to prove I did it.

It was only when I got home that I realised the T shirt doesn't have today's date on it, so rather than showing off proudly to shoppers in town that I had already done a Fun Run this morning, I probably just looked 5 days out of date....

So a really really sporty day. And do my legs hurt?

Yep. Lots.

Girly shopping day

2011-03-01T18:17:00.004Z

Ice Cream Sian and I decided it was high time we had a girly half day out - I asked her what she really wanted to do on an afternoon off, and she mentioned sauna, massage, bit of pampering, that kind of thing.

We made do with shopping.

In the car we had a proper girly chat. About work, running, mud, work, mud, running, work, mud and work. We're running the St David's Day 5k Fun Run on Sunday for Hapus (the ice cream parlour) so do say hi if we run past you. Or, far more likely, you run past us...

We spent a bit of time clothes shopping although I think our method of 'yeah, they look about right' may not be the absolute best way to ensure a good fit in trousers, and I bought socks too. Pink, of course... bargain, couldn't resist them.

And Sian bought shoes. As the boots she was wearing were from a time before she met her husband (and how long is that now - 13 years?) she thought it was about time. And they're PRETTY! Really colourful. So now I'm jealous...

The plan when we got home was to go for a test run (OK, I just wanted to see them muddy and not so colourful FAST) but Sian's tweaked her Achilles, so it was just me who went for a run. I sort of did Fit Mark's First Training Run in reverse - not actually going backwards, if you see what I mean, but doing the route the opposite way round. Nope, that still sounds like I went backwards... Anyway, I set off in the opposite direction and made it a bit shorter. But apart from that it was the same run. I missed out about 1.2k because I thought it was going to get dark and I had already done a dog walk, 5k on the bike and a half mile swim, but I'm not sure I'm going to tell Fit Mark exactly which bits I missed out.

Because it was all the muddy bits...

Aha! Secret training...

2011-02-28T19:35:00.003Z

I have spies. And very good spies they are too, even if they do have six legs between the two of them...

Guy and Rubbish Running Dog were out for their evening walk. I was at home 'not training' as in 'absolutely properly having a not training day' which apparently is A Good Idea. And Guy bumped into Ice Cream Sian going to a Keep Fit class.

Aha!

They even plotted not to tell me in case I thought I ought to be doing it too (in amongst the running, swimming and cycling).

Mind you, Guy offered to drive Ice Cream Sian's car home so that she'd have to run the 3k back from the class. She said no...

And she calls that proper training...

2011-02-27T13:03:00.003Z

On Saturday Ice Cream Sian and I go running. On our own. Fit Mark is off doing some sort of stag weekend - yomping over Dartmoor with 16 pubs in 48 miles. Or was it 48 pubs in 16 miles? I'm a little hazy on the details and by the end of it I expect Fit Mark will just be a little hazy...

We start at Ice Cream Sian's this time. We're determine to beat last week's time (1.06.55) mostly because Fit Mark said he expected us to. And as we're leaving Ice Cream Sian's house her husband reminds her they have masses to do and says we have an hour. No pressure then...

We set off. We're really lucky to live in the Welsh valleys near Caerphilly. We have lots of fields, forests, steep hills (they're all mountains really) and serious mud. And I have new shoes. However, after a bit of this...

They look like this...

Oddly, it no longer seems to matter what colour they were when I bought them...

We run exactly the same route that we did with Fit Mark last week. Only it's much wetter - seriously boggy this time. Even the field on top of the mountain that we run across is bottomless. In fact, it's so wet that Chepstow races, scheduled for the afternoon and only 23 miles away, has been called off due to 'heavy ground'. Really, those horses are such wimps.

We keep going, through mud and field and hill and forest (where there are going to be stunning bluebells in a few months - are we going too slow if we've got time to notice?) and there's much shrieking from Ice Cream Sian as she's still in ordinary trainers and sliding all over the place.

As we're approaching our finishing point I'm keeping an eye on the time - and we run REALLY fast down the last bit of forestry. I didn't know I could run that fast. I'm keeping up with Ice Cream Sian (just) only to find out afterwards that she didn't know she could go that fast either, and she thought she was keeping up with me. We finish.

1.04.52.

HOORAY! We've shaved off 2 minutes and 3 seconds and it was really heavy going! Woo Hoo!

We are, fairly reasonably, utterly knackered. And Ice Cream Sian's feet are a bit of a mess...

Yep, that's real blood. I blame the brambles...

I decide to hose my shoes off and balance precariously in the flower bed whilst hosing my tootsies with ice cold water.

It has since been pointed out to me that it would be easier if I took the shoes off... But, hey, since when was 'easy' any fun?!

Ice Cream Sian and I are very pleased with ourselves. We have two goals for this coming week:-

1. Get Ice Cream Sian some not-so-slippy running shoes.

2. Prepare ourselves for next weekend. Having been euphoric that we beat our time from last week, the slow realisation has dawned that next week Fit Mark (now also known as Sergeant Major Mark) will expect us to run quicker again.

Eek.

Oh golly...

2011-02-23T18:06:00.004Z

See, there I was at work, happily showing Paula what I'm planning to practise for at the weekend, and then I spot my name...

It seems that the lovely people at Oblivion (and, let's face it, half the reason I entered is because they all sound nicely nuts) have found my blog - they've even called it a nice blog. Aw, shucks...

http://www.mudrunner.co.uk/news.html

See, on the right of the News page! I guess that means the birthday party might get a little bigger now - I've already had a comment from the third guy in the first picture from Feb 12th (hello Neil) - so he's naturally invited.

We'll be easy to spot in the car park - birthday cake, LOTS of candles, muddy people.

I'd better go practise...

First training session...

2011-02-20T16:48:00.005Z

I really should have blogged last night, but I was knackered, so you'll get a 'Saturday' and 'Sunday' approach instead...

Saturday

8am and we're all ready to go. Eeek (again). I've been up since 7 trying not to be so nervous, Ice Cream Sian has been up since, ooh, about 7.55 because she was still working at 2am and overslept, and Fit Mark has had a bowl of Cheerios, something to do with chocolate and 3 cups of coffee... At least one of us is prepared then...

Fit Mark looks bright eyed and raring to go. He says he did consider turning up in jeans and a big coat with a loud hailer to just walk in front of us and shout a lot, but changed his mind. Phew. So here we are - me in my lycra showing all the bulgy bits, Fit Mark looking like he knows what he's doing (because he does) and Ice Cream Sian a little sleepy and not in lycra.

Fit Mark says he's worked out a 'nice 5.6k route'. That'll be .6k further than I've EVER run before then. And in mud. Hmmm. We set off. The first mile is fairly flat - but within the first half mile we find a seriously boggy bit and I run round it. Fit Mark notices and points out (fairly reasonably) that if we're going to be doing a Mud Run it might actually be an idea to get one's feet wet... fair enoughski. After the first mile, the second mile is ALL uphill. Ice Cream Sian and I plod up the hill, while Fit Mark pretty much walks in front of us. We do climb over a fallen tree at one stage, which we're Pretty Damned Impressed with. It almost counts as an obstacle! There's another bit where you can go left down a steep slope or right through a polite gate - I choose left and slither a lot, Ice Cream Sian goes right and stays on her feet, and Fit Mark chooses an option which I didn't know existed - straight on over a four foot drop. BLIMEY!

Fit Mark nips nimbly up the hill, stopping to encourage us and point out the way to go, and Ice Cream Sian and I slide and slip up the hill considerably more slowly. But it is FUN! It is incredibly muddy and once your feet have got wet the first time, it's really fun.

Then we're up to the highest point, and we begin to run towards home... across fields, through puddles, over slippery bits. Fit Mark is doing just fine, but Ice Cream Sian and I are really slipping badly. We need better shoes... We get within sight of home and I suggest an Alternative Route. This is further, and Fit Mark is at pains to point out that it is Entirely My Idea And Not His Fault At All. However, I do have reasons for my alternative route - it goes right past Sian's house (yes, a bit mean as she's left her car at mine, so has to run past her cosy home) and it also involves a good ditch and running across a river. It's a good alternative route, if a bit further.

Total run - 6.45km. Yay! That's 1.45 km further than I've ever run before, and I really enjoyed it! We have photos once we get home.

Fit Mark looks no different to when we started. In fact, he says he's cold. Yeah, right...

Ice Cream Sian and I, on the other hand, are Utterly Knackered. And splendidly filthy. Ice Cream Sian's trousers are wet and heavy with mud, and I'm hot and sweaty. We look lovely.

But it was HUGE fun - we really enjoyed ourselves. Fit Mark says he's busy next weekend (hah, wimping out already!) but Ice Cream Sian and I have plans to practise on our own. If we can get better shoes...

Sunday

On the hunt for Better Shoes, I drag Guy off to Bath. But first I swim half a mile to try and unstiffen the bits wot are stiff from yesterday - mostly my calves, weirdly. That's a whole new bit that hasn't ached before! Anyway, we head to Bath to visit Running Bath, a specialist, er, running shop (fab name or what?) that happens to be run by old friends of mine from my Daisy days when we all had other jobs. Anyway, Neil, Jo and Malcolm run this shop (and new online shop - fab) and I know they'll give me good advice... And Fit Mark has told me which shoes to aim at. They're called Inov8. Clever name, huh?

I try them on. They have slim toes and normal heels. I have feet shaped like a duck - narrow heels and wide toes. The Inov8 shoe is hopeless. I get really good advice and endless patience from the shop who bring out countless others for me to try and I and even run up and down the pavement outside the shop... Eventually I whittle it down to two - a really snazzy lime green, white and pink pair, and a stunningly ugly black pair. I am forced to admit that the black ones are better. Bummer! Still, it won't matter once they're covered in mud...

See - ugly. Even when arranged like Jimmy Choos, still ugly.

From a girly point of view, I'm gutted that I've bought shoes that are so, well, functional. However, when we get near home we bump into Fit Mark and I show him my shoes (how old am I now - 6??).

He says they're 'awesome'.

I'm a happy mud bunny...

Eeeeeeeeek meeting!

2011-02-13T17:51:00.006Z

Well, we had decided an Eeeek Meeting was a good idea, so this morning Guy, Fit Mark and I went up to Ice Cream Sian's lovely ice cream parlour to have our first team (or Eeeek) meeting. I'd printed out some pictures of last year's Oblivion Mud Runner race, and this is the moment when Ice Cream Sian realised just what's involved:

And, yes, that's me laughing unsympathetically.... that arm coming in from the right is Fit Mark who's clearly pointing out some ghastliness of the obstacles - he's done it before!

Then we got onto technicalities, like, um, 'training' and 'lycra' (baggy T shirts are out, apparently, as they collect too much mud and water) and 'cross country trainers'.

Eeeek again. Training? Don't they know I only 'practise' at the moment? We are now set for our first training run next Saturday at 7.30am. Eeeek! Fit Mark is good at running and Ice Cream Sian's done a half marathon. I'm still learning to do 5k without expiring... As a 'for instance' as to how our training regimes differ, yesterday morning Guy and I were sitting up in bed with the curtains pulled back having our hot cross buns and Mark ran past on the lane... See? Slight difference in approach...

So now I need to go find some 'all terrain' shoes.

And practise!

Eeeeeeeek!!!

2011-02-12T19:07:00.003Z

Um, I've entered something. So now I'm REALLY trying to get fit - I've done two 'home made triathlons' this week (5k run, 10k exercise bike, mile swim). Yay! Although I'm not sure whether I'm getting fitter or just knackered... Must be fitter, surely??

Anyway, the reason is this: I have been seriously tempted to enter the Oblivion Mud Runner 2011. Because it's on my birthday. And it involves mud. Then on Monday this week I was chatting to Ice Cream Sian about it and she said she'd do it too. Yay! I am so excited - it will be SO much more fun (yes, fun!) with someone else.... So then we got thinking if we got one more we could be a team of 3. We could call ourselves Got-a-Sec? and have team T shirts and everything even if we are going to be rubbish because I'm hopeless at running and Ice Cream Sian reckons she's hopeless at climbing over things. We decided we wanted Fit Mark as our third. On the basis that he's (a) fit (b) a big strong chap and (c) he can run and climb over things.

We emailed him and asked, explaining that Ice Cream Sian can't climb and I can't run so we'd TOTALLY understand if he wanted to do it on his own and be competitive and that our aim for a finish time was 'the same day'.

He said yes! We're so chuffed, we really are. He is already trying to find a mud-resistant camera so he can take pics of us on the way round.

This is what it might look like...

And finally, after the lake, there's this:

Now doesn't that look like fun?

My nephew Charlie has also entered, so now I'm thinking the whole birthday picnic thing after we've finished. Which will be tea-time...

Hence the reason for the extra fitness training!

Do I hear the word 'bonkers' out there?

I can see clearly now....

2011-02-06T18:06:00.002Z

Yay! I have varifocal CONTACT LENSES! How cool is that?! This means that when I'm running I'll actually be able to see my flash watch thingy. Yay! Utterly brilliant. How did I live without them? It is slightly bizarre not having to fumble for my glasses all the time...

One teensy problem - the distance vision is rubbish. Anything further than 10 feet away is a blur, which is actually worse than my normal vision. But I can see my running watch! And how much do you need to see when running badly anyway? As long as I can see the direction I'm meant to go in...

When I was having them fitted the optician and technician were giving me dire warnings about how NOT to swim in them, even with goggles, so I was having visions of trying to put lenses in during transition from swim to bike. Bad idea, especially given this morning's efforts to poke the things in (10 minutes and a lot of cursing). But then I googled 'triathlon contact lenses' and found all sorts of lovely forums about how, yes, it's fine - just wear good goggles, try not to cycle into a headwind and blink a lot if you get grit in your eye. And one lovely story from a lady who's the World Champion Ladies Triathlon something or other who is apparently incredibly short sighted - she said they put a table out after the swim section for people to put their glasses on but she couldn't even find the table... Anyway, she now competes in lenses and it's fine. Although they can get blown out on the bike section...

I have had a very lazy week, training wise. A combination of long working days, tiredness and a general 'it's cold, it's dark, it's winter, where's my cocoa?' feeling meant that I didn't touch the bike or the pool at all. However, I am now back to the '10k exercise bike, mile swim' routine, and also had a long dog walk today. I do feel better for it... And today, for the first time, I did the whole 10k on the exercise bike WITHOUT stopping. And in a personal best time of 25 minutes. Hooray!

Now all I have to do is crack the running... My nephew Charly has suggested that I do the Bristol 10k with him in May. I have pointed out that this is twice as far as my knees already say is Too Far, but he seems very keen.

And he's running it dressed as a crocodile...

It's a new sport!

2011-01-30T22:40:00.004Z

Actually, I don't think it's a new sport at all - I'm sure I've heard of Extreme Ironing before now. But it wasn't really Extreme Ironing I did, more Extreme Housework...

The weekends are never long enough - we were determined to have a relaxing weekend this time round, but it didn't really work out, and by Sunday morning there were Too Many Things To Do And Not Enough Time. So in order to be able to do some real practising (still can't call it training), I figured out I'd have to do the housework fast. Really fast. First up 10k on the exercise bike. Quickly. Then a mile swim - which takes half an hour. I suppose I could crank the speed up a bit... Then Fast Hoovering, Manic Mopping, Quick Polishing, Sprint Supermarket Shopping, Turbo Bed Changing and Express Laundry. Phew. The trouble with housework is that once you start you see all sorts of bits that you missed... so while I'm sitting here, relatively late on Sunday evening, I can see a huge cobweb from the lamp to the shelf above the computer. Damn. I shall have to try all over again next weekend...

And today was a gloriously sunny day in South Wales - perfect for a bike ride! So did we get ourselves into our cleats and go off somewhere? Nope. We did housework.

Memo to self for next weekend: GET OUT ON THE BIKES!

Anyone know yet what the weather's going to do??!

And the Santa time is...

2011-01-23T15:08:00.003Z

To be revealed later!

My research into this running stuff seems to indicate that preparation is everything. Having still not actually done much running, courtesy of dodgy knees, this morning I went with 'toast, Lucozade, dark chocolate, paracetamol, ibuprofen and Deep Heat'. Works for me...

First of all Rubbish Running Dog and I dressed appropriately... There had been some discussion on Facebook as to whether people were going to wear their Santa outfits. Everybody did, bar about 3 people... So there were some 600 Santas wandering round the park. Quite a sight! Rubbish Running Dog wasn't actually going to run with me - but she was the only dog dressed appropriately!

We had a mass warm up, courtesy of Real Radio. I'm somewhere in the middle of that lot - I did start the warm up exercises, then abandoned the star jumps and just did stretchy stuff.

Then at 12.30 we were off! Bit like the London marathon in that there were so many people it was impossible to run at the beginning (shame!) so I set my clever watch timing thingy as I actually went under the start gate...

Guy followed us up through the park, then figured out where we were coming back and got into position to take piccies. Meanwhile as I puffed my way round Bute Park first of all the belt came off (I think I'd knotted it too tight) then my trousers bust and had to be cobbled back together, then I abandoned the hat, and tucked the beard inside my number... I looked lovely!

And then we were almost at the end - remarkably quickly. Probably quick because it was a bit short on the whole 'distance' thing - only 4.37km. My time? A rather stunning 30 minutes 38 seconds. I've figured out the maths now, and if it had been a complete 5k my time would have been 34.40. Which is still good! And NOT 38 minutes! YAY! My 'split times' were all around the 7 minutes a kilometre speed, which is fine... last time I ran on two dodgy knees I was 8.30 by the end.... Definitely an improvement! YAY again!

The next challenge will be to run 5k and not feel like I'm going to expire at the end of it. Hah!

There was a small boy running in front of me most of the way round with his dad. About 8 years old, going quicker than me, and chatting all the way, not even remotely out of breath. How does he do that?? He was number 322085 - hats off to you, whoever you were!

I'm not really that shape. It's the cobbled together bust trousers!

Honest...

It needs oiling...

2011-01-21T16:03:00.002Z

In my latest zeal to look less flabby in lycra, I decided to 'up' the practising and since Saturday I've been doing 10k on the exercise bike followed by a mile swim each day. This is Good Stuff. So this week I've done 60k on the bike! I must be somewhere near Swindon - I'll be at my brother's by Monday (Caroline, please stick the kettle on!).

However, there is a glitch. Instead of getting easier each night, it's been getting harder. And harder... At the end of last night's 10k (and I was too dim to stop when it got really difficult) I realised that the pedals were practically not turning at all unless I jumped on them. Novel, but not a great cycling technique... As the kilometremeter (is that right? In miles it would be a milometer, so in kilometres it's a ... pass.) Anyway, as the thingy wot records how far I've gone has now passed 500k, I think it's seizing up. I know the feeling.

It needed oil.

Do we have bike oil? Nope. But we do have chain saw oil (as every girl should). Oil is oil (surely), so I've used the cat's medicine dropper thingy (it's ok, it's an old one he doesn't need it back) to drop oil on the chain. And tonight I'll find out if it's any better...

And if it isn't I may well be limping for the Santa Run on Sunday...

Events... Abu Dhabi, anyone??

2011-01-16T18:36:00.005Z

I'm planning my year of events. I haven't got very far... There's the postponed Christmas 2010 Santa Run next Sunday, then the Try-a-Tri in early May, the Cosmeston Sprint Triathlon (I won't be sprinting, I think that just means it's a short distance!) then Tri-for-Life in July which is at the same place as my triathlon last year.. and then nothing. I think I need more events.

I am seriously tempted by the 'Oblivion Mud Runner' on 8th May - described as a 'supreme test of endurance and fitness' complete with bits to swim and things to climb over. And it does happen to take place on my birthday.... I need to be able to run 6 miles first though... Guy thinks I'm mad...

And my brother has just come back from watching the Yas Marina Triathlon in Abu Dhabi (he was flying the plane for BA which is a Damned Fine Reason to be there). Apparently the swim was in the marina, the cycle was around the F1 track, the run was around the edge of the circuit and transition was in the pit lane! I said I fancied it for next year if he can smuggle me and my lovely bike on his aeroplane...

I've upped my 'training' so now I'm doing 10k on the exercise bike and a mile swim each day. Phew! Not running at all as my knees still protest, so I'm doing my old knee exercises (for my old knees) and tricking them into thinking they're not going to go running any more. Cunning or what?! They'll be fine for the Santa Run...

And a last thought - when I was creaking round Bute Park last Sunday I passed (she was going the other way, I've never actually overtaken anyone) by a young girl with a very blonde pony tail running very easily. Then a bit further on I passed her again. Blimey, I thought - she's doing laps a bit quick! Then I passed her again... On about the fourth 'pass' just when I was getting really depressed, I realised her jacket was a different colour... it was twins!!

If you fancy a laugh next Sunday do come and cheer me on at the Santa Fun Run. It's somewhere in Bute Park just off North Road at 12.30pm. We should be easy to spot - about 1,000 people in Santa outfits... Or 999 people in ordinary running gear and me in my Santa suit...

And one very last thing... if anybody watches Pobol Y Cwm (anybody?) look out for a pink handbag cake at the 18th birthday party with a 'Sex and the City' theme. Should be the episode on Thursday or Friday. Guy and I made the cake, and it's going to start a food fight. Although probably not on its own, I suspect an actor may be involved...

I'm a proper cyclist!

2011-01-13T20:06:00.004Z

Fit Mark (who is a Real Runner and does Iron Man things) very kindly sent me an e-mail about me and my cleats....

He says: "You are now a proper cyclist by the way. It is a right of passage on your first ride in clipless pedals to fall over because you couldn't clip out in time. We have all done it. I fell off at traffic lights on Plymouth's busiest roundabout during rush hour, much to the amusement of passing drivers."

I am much comforted by this... and nobody saw me when I fell off! The hole in the knee is much improved, thank you.

Looks like the Big Bike Ride tomorrow may be OFF. Way too much rain...

Gutted.

My cleats are too tight...

2011-01-09T16:25:00.003Z

It's been a good week on the 'training' (or practising, as I think I should call it) front... I've been running in the mud twice and it was only sleeting once... I've been running on the mud, on the roads, on the hills and on as many flat bits as there are round here (which isn't many). Wherever I run my time for 5k seems to be about 38 minutes, even if I only do 3k and multiply it. At the triathlon I did 38 minutes too. Mindful of what Fit Mark said about mud, hills and grass being slower to run on, I come up with A Plan. This morning after visiting the Farmer's Market in Cardiff, I will run round Bute Park. It's flat and it has proper paths. Hooray! With my clever new watch timing thingy I can do a proper 5k. Hooray! And time it. Hooray! I even warm up properly this time - my Adductor/Flexor (which sounds like a new film starring Arnie...) is a bit tweaked from the run in the sleet as I didn't warm up properly. To be fair, it was very difficult to get warm standing in Rudry Common's car park in driving sleet. So I just started running... Anyway, it's tweaked. So this time I warm up properly and set off... Guy says I am limping as I leave him and Blunkett behind. After 1k the right knee joins the Adductor Flexor and starts complaining. After 2k the left knee joins in and after 3k the left ankle starts yelling at me. I keep going, mostly on the basis that after 5k I will be back at the car and I have to get there somehow. I get slower and slower... My clever watch thingy has a large notice on the screen saying 'LOW BATTERY' (I know how it feels) and I can't see my time... I finish and I think it says 30 minutes. Hooray! Then I get rid of the low battery message and find that it doesn't - it says 38. How can it POSSIBLY be 38 minutes? On the tri run I was (a) useless and (b) walking a lot of it. Identical time. How? This time I ran every step of the way. And measured it properly... Maybe I'll be faster when my right thigh, right knee, left knee and left ankle don't hurt? Good grief...

And I didn't wear my varifocals to run - I am getting used to them but thought I didn't need them. This was borne out when, near the end, I saw Guy (black hat, red fleece, dark trousers, wellies and black labrador) walking and waved vigorously at them. With both arms. Then called to Blunkett, put my arms out and made 'YAY, BLUNKETT!' noises. They ignored me. Not Guy or Blunkett. Deeply unfair of unknown bloke to wear same gear and have same coloured dog...

And I also (at long last) got on the bike. Hooray again! I am planning a good bike ride on Friday of this week to a meeting with my accountant in the Bay, so wanted to try out my new pedals beforehand while Guy was around to advise... he knows more about bikes than I do. I have flash pedals that the cycle shoes clip straight in to - makes you go faster with less effort, which sounds like a Damned Splendid Idea. I had a little practice of getting the shoe unclipped (you twist your ankle out) and it seemed stiff but 'do-able'. Off we went. We only cycled down to the factory and Guy pulled up in a layby. I pulled up beside him, couldn't get my foot released, and fell straight over sideways complete with bike. Nothing broken, although I have a good hole in my running trousers, and a fairly good hole in my knee. It'll be fine when it stops bleeding - it's only been 24 hours so far, so it's early days yet. On the way home Guy went far enough ahead of me to get off his bike in order to catch me as I fell again. Only this time I didn't fall - I actually got my foot released! Hooray again! We've got the same pedals to put on Guy's bike in due course, so I read the instructions later in the evening - apparently there's a tension on the fixings which you can make looser and easier. Easier? That's exactly what I need! I'll get them fixed as soon as I can.

Or as soon as I buy a 2.5mm allen key...

Happy New Year!

2011-01-04T13:19:00.004Z

Yes, I know it's 4th January, but it's been a little chaotic what with hospital visits and things... However, I do have a New Plan for hospital visiting... I drive to the hospital, see mum, then drive half way home and park on Rudry Common. And run the rest of the way home, across the top of Rudry Common, and down the hills and fields to home. About 5k. Well, according to my watch it's 3.33k to the middle of the woods then it threw a wobbly and said it was 2.9k the whole way home. Yeah, right.... Must speak to Fit Mark and find out how to work it properly! Anyway, once I'm home I collect Rubbish Running Dog and walk back up to the car by a different route, then drive us both home. Result! It's highly recommended for banishing stress and it's much more fun than running on the road!

I am, of course, wearing my New Pink Top, my New Snot Resistant Gloves and my New Running Watch, even if it does seem a little dodgy on the distances... it's all done by GPS, so maybe it just lost where I was in the woods.

We had Oldest Friend Sarah and Vincent the Beer staying for New Year, so of course we all went and walked at Merthyr Mawr. Only one of us was brave enough to paddle... guess who?! Even Rubbish Running Dog was strangely reluctant to get her paws wet... it wasn't even that cold! Well, ok, yes it was, and my toes were VERY pink afterwards!

I am thinking of joining a triathlon club (hmm, Newport or Cardiff), but wondering if I really have the time, I'm planning to get the bike out eventually now that the snow has gone, and I am swimming at least half a mile every day.

And Guy and I have decided that this is the year we are going to Have More Fun and Do New Things. Go-Karting probably, bungee-jumping definitely not.

Any ideas?!

Boxing Day!

2010-12-26T18:51:00.002Z

So that's Christmas over for another year... bit of a weird one this year. Well, bit of a weird two really as Big Bruvver came over on Friday and brought mum out of hospital for lunch at our house, then Guy and his mum and me did Christmas all over again on Saturday. Christmas Day. Golly - and now it's Boxing Day and I keep nodding off... I did try to swim this morning but the pool was FREEZING so I wimped out... I think the ground temperature is now so low that the pool just can't stay warm. I like cold water and all that but, really, There Are Limits...

So, triathlon related Christmas presents? Oh yes! Fabulous pink running top from Guy's mum which will be lovely if it ever thaws enough to run again, an amazing runners watch which can track my route, time, distance and upload it all to the computer so I can chart my progress (or lack of!) which will be lovely if it ever thaws enough to run again, and proper running gloves (complete with bits to wipe my snotty nose on and grippy bits on index finger and thumb to do fab new clever watch controls with) which will be lovely if it ever thaws enough... you get the picture!

Fit Mark kindly advised Guy on the watch issue... he had one of these when we did the Mud Run, and you can set them up to beep every kilometre, which would have been nice as I had no idea how far I'd gone. I think my fab new watch is the same as Fit Mark's, except mine has the added advantage of telling the time too... always a bonus in a watch.

And a book called 'Cycling in Wales' which is all sorts of routes to cycle... might be fun if it ever thaws enough to cycle again... The description for the route past Castell Coch says 'short steep climb up to Castell Coch'. STEEP? It's practically VERTICAL!!! Will take their descriptions with a pinch of salt...

And four plastic flashing ducks. Nope, I have no idea what they have to do with Triathlons either...

I gave Guy an onboard bike computer gadget, bike socks, bike sunglasses and bike 'keep your arms warm' thingies. Anyone else spot the theme here?

Challenge for this week? Varifocals!!! My new fab watch is very new and very fab, but I can't see it unless I'm wearing my reading glasses. I have tried varifocals before and it was an unmitigated disaster at a very swanky (and expensive) opticians. This time I'm heading for SpecSavers...

But only after a bit more sleep...

A whole new competition!

2010-12-19T14:55:00.004Z

Well, the doctors never made it to the hospital on Friday, and neither did I... We had 10 inches of snow, and there was no way out from here...

Still, on the bright side, we have invented a Whole New Competition! It's called a SNOWATHLON! It's a two day event - we tried it out this weekend and we think it will catch on...

First you do a four hour hike across Rudry Common to get to the nearest hospital except you don't ever make it because after 2 hours you're only just over half way there and it's just Too Damned Far.

Four hours. FOUR HOURS. Needless to say Rubbish Running Dog is a bit knackered today, bless her. She may be rubbish at running but she's jolly enthusiastic in snow!

Then on the second day you do 250 square metres of snow shovelling:

And finally a double helping of Car Snow Clearing:

After Phases 2 and 3 of the new Snowathlon I can get my car out - it's now parked in the village so I can at least go to work and the hospital tomorrow.

And we STILL haven't decorated the Christmas tree we bought last weekend - it's been sitting in a bucket of water (ok, ice now) since last week... we had meant to decorate it Wednesday evening, but it sort of didn't happen...

We're hoping the new Sarah Snowathlon will catch on.

As long as there's snow...

Exercise is not always good for you...

2010-12-17T07:46:00.003Z

It's not that I've overdone it or anything - but my mum has! She was walking the dog on Tuesday, had a bit of a turn and now she's in the Miners in Caerphilly in a ward full of slightly mad old ladies... Evenings this week (ok, and most of Tuesday) have been spent in the hospital, so any thought of 'training' (or even 'practising') has sort of fallen away and anyway it's too dark by the evenings to have a go on the bikes. Still, there was always the weekend ...

Except...

Yep, this morning we have woken up to SNOW. The road through the village is dreadful, the main road hasn't been cleared at all, and the only things moving are 4X4s and men in white vans... We have a meeting with the doc at the hospital later. We may walk the 4 miles through the snow to get there (which will count as training), but what do we do with Rubbish Running Dog when we get there???

Bicycles!!

2010-12-12T18:26:00.002Z

We have BICYCLES! Hooray! We went to pick them up yesterday, but it was still way too cold and icy to ride them home, so the Very Nice Man at the bike shop (Castle Bikes, Caerphilly, thank you) said he would deliver them to us. And he did! It was by then dark and we have no lights, so we couldn't actually ride them....

Here is Guy's bike:

And here's my bike:

You've guessed - it's a game of Spot The Difference! There are actually THREE differences between the bikes (and, no, the position of the rugs isn't one of them). Answers at the bottom of the blog...

When we were in the shop we also bought a lovely collection of Other Things A Cyclist Will Need - like water bottles, water bottle holders, bells (yes, bicycle bells - very useful for letting people on the Taff Trail know that we're behind them), shorts (for Guy), cycling top (for Guy), pump for inflating the tyres, padlocks for when we want to secure the bikes, shoes for me. The shoes are apparently a new model - pretty silver colour. Apparently in biking silver is THE colour to have - shows you know what you're doing. Which I don't.

So today, Sunday, my main aim was to try the bike, but we had stuff to do first - we bought a Christmas tree (can't be done after work - way too dark), rebuilt the squirrel assault course (as you do), cleaned cars (filthy in this weather), cleared leaves off the lawn (been under snow for two weeks), moved logs from the kitchen to the sitting room (needed for the log burner), and moved logs from the log store to the kitchen (so they can dry out before we need them) and then cleaned the kitchen and the sitting room because of all the bits of log we'd dropped...

And then it was dark. So I still haven't tried my bike.... next weekend. Definitely!

So did you Spot The Differences?

1. Guy's saddle is much higher

2. Guy's bike has pedals with strappy things on (toeclips, apparently) - mine have no strappy things because the bling silver shoes I bought are Proper Bike Shoes with cleats to clip on to the pedals to make me go faster... I'm a little worried about actually getting them clipped in - Charly, I may need some tuition here! (Charly is my mountain biking nephew who actually knows what he's doing).

3. My bike is prettier. And it will be prettier again when I ask Gareth the Print to do me some graphics for it...

It's RACE DAY!

2010-12-05T16:28:00.003Z

Or not, as it's been postponed until January... Tempted though I was to don my Santa suit and jog round Bute Park anyway, we opted for a visit to the farmers' market instead. Which is right next to Bute Park. And, yep, it was icy. So probably best not to be running on it...

However, feeling in need of serious exercise, I decided to do my own Santa Triathlon at home. Which naturally I have called the Santa Tri-Elf-Lon.

First the swim....

As the Santa suit is made entirely of felt, I thought it quite possibly might disintegrate in the water, so I settled for my wetsuit and just the hat instead.

Very fetching... I swam for half an hour, but after 20 minutes realised that (a) my goggles weren't steaming up (b) I wasn't out of breath and (c) I was bored. I cranked the speed of the water up considerably, which sorted out (a), (b) and (c) remarkably quickly.

Then the 'bike'...

And apparently real cyclists Get Very Annoyed when us triathletes call it 'the bike' as if bike is a verb. As I was always rubbish at grammar, I shall still call it 'the bike'.

It was too slippy to be out on the roads near Caerphilly, so I settled for 5k on the exercise bike instead. In the Santa suit. Or Santa Sauna Suit as it really ought to be called. Anyone wanting to lose a few pounds can hire it from me. At very reasonable rates, naturally...

Then the dreaded run...

Just up and down the lane because of it being so slippery anywhere else. And in fact, not 'up and down the lane' so much as 'is that enough for a photo'. I'm still getting odd twinges in my adductor/hip flexor/whatever, so decided not to be brave and twang it again.

Yep, I wimped out...

It looks sunny and un-icy. Note the shiny black-icy patch on the lane in the other direction... that's why I'm going this way!

So that's it, I've done my first ever Santa Tri-Elf-Lon. Next year I may recruit others to join in with me.

Any takers?

And the Santa run is...

2010-12-03T18:01:00.001Z

Er, off. Yep, off. I had an email this afternoon to say that it is postponed because of the severe weather warning issued by the Met Office for Sunday and the fact that the paths are still covered in thick ice.

But I had physio and everything!

It will now be held on 23rd Jan. And they STILL expect us to turn up in Santa suits... I'm not entirely sure that'll be quite as festive. Hey ho.

Or hey 'ho ho ho' as we Santas say!

Less hopping, more bopping...

2010-12-02T23:48:00.004Z

I went for physio on Monday and it was fabulous - seen by Christine the Physio who reckoned it was my hip flexor rather than my adductor, shoved the lovely patch things that go 'fizz' on it, then heat, then showed me stretching exercises, then massaged it. Result? No pain, free leg, bliss... She also said to keep it warm. In this weather? Not easy!

On Tuesday night I went to a network 'do' - very dark room, very noisy, hopeless for networking as I could neither see nor hear anybody. However, I did meet (and she recognised me first) someone I used to work in Barclays with 25 years ago. Good grief. She didn't look a day older - extraordinary!

Today I went for more physio again - my leg is heaps better but still having just the odd twinge, so better safe than sorry and all that. I went very early as I had to be in central Cardiff by 8.45, so I was on the treatment table by 7.30... Behind a curtain to preserve my modesty then when I was all hooked up to the fizzy machine and covered up to be decent Christine pulled the curtain back a bit, and the very handsome, very fit looking young man at the next table said 'hello Sarah'. Turned out to be Ed and I used to help exercise his horses some, ooh, 20 years ago. How do people do this? Recognise one so quickly? I am always completely flummoxed when I see people out of the context in which I know them... Maybe I just have a seriously weird face that people don't forget however hard they try... Anyway, it was really lovely to see him again and chat houses, work, dogs and injuries (frequent on both our parts so we may meet again). Small place, Cardiff.

Then I went to my conference in a hotel (let's name and shame - the HOLLAND HOUSE HOTEL) where the heating wasn't working and the air conditioning had kicked in instead. It was FREEZING. I was there till after lunch (ok, the lunch was nice) and then back to the office to organise some seminar attendances for next week, and then back down into Cardiff to meet up with the girls from one of my clients to see Mama Mia. I had arranged to meet them in the Italian restaurant near the Millennium Centre, but couldn't see them when I arrived. So I sat and had a glass of wine. By 6.15 I was thinking I really ought to eat, so I ordered and then spotted Sue across the restaurant - they'd been there all the time but I hadn't spotted them because they were looking so glam. I went over for a chat, somebody pinched my seat and then I found the waiter looking lost with my lasagne thinking 'where the hell did she go?' I did get reunited with it, and we all managed to sit at one table together to eat...

If any of you reading this live near or in Cardiff, go and see Mama Mia - utterly brilliant! Fantastic sets, great singing (knocks X Factor into a cocked hat and then some), good costumes and just a truly fab night out. Good chance for bopping too...

Go see!

Hopalong Bowden...

2010-11-28T18:59:00.003Z

Yep, I'm LIMPING! After my recent physio on the 'groin' strain, I was told gentle running was ok, so off I went on Tuesday night. In the dark. It was weird running down the lane in the dark - I really couldn't see where my feet were going and although I knew it was flat and safe, it felt very disjointed! It was also very cold, but it was only my thumbs that froze... I eventually kept them warm by tucking them inside my fingers and running with fists. Odd, but it stopped them getting frostbite. There were a lot of people out running on the pavements - I met at least five others, including two women with all the right gear looking very professional. I met them head on and then a bit later they were behind me, catching me up. I let them pass and then tried to keep up - which I could! That makes me as fast as them! Yay! I did notice, however, that the girl at the back had a much shorter stride pattern than me, so I tried to keep step with her - she was doing about 3 steps to each of mine and when I tried to keep step it felt very strange - teensy little steps. So, the BIG question is: Is it more knackering to do three times as many steps, but only little ones, or more knackering to do my long loping strides? Given that I haven't really been able to walk properly since, perhaps the little steps are the answer?

My leg stiffened up the next day and has been getting steadily worse since. We now have fairly major snow in Caerphilly and the cold isn't really helping. I have spent the weekend in hot baths, then reeking of Deep Heat, and with a hottie pretty much strapped to my leg. Has it helped? Has it heck! This morning in desperation I emailed Fit Mark to ask if he knew a physio who would work on Sundays... he responded that his tame physio is currently in Afghanistan and, whilst I am desperate, I'm probably not that desperate...

Fit Mark also said that he was moving like an 80 year old today as last night, in temperatures of -10C he did the Brecon Beacons Sleepwalk - 18.5 miles in the dark across the wild and windy Beacons. I told my friend Sarah B (yes, I know she's got the same name, it has got a bit complicated since I got married) about this and she said 'what's he made of - iron?' and I said I thought he probably was... Well done Fit Mark, absolutely brilliant, please don't ask me to join you next time!

Oh, and another thing: I've bought a new bike! Well, a bike. It's new, but as I haven't had one before it's not a 'new bike', is it? Guy is getting one too and we want to ride them home from the shop in Caerphilly. Last weekend was wet and cold, so we wimped out. And now we have snow and ice - totally unsafe for bicycles, so we couldn't pick them up again. Can I now ask for nice warm dry weather next Saturday?

And of course nice warm dry weather for a week today for the 5k Santa run. Yes, I have only got one working leg at the moment.

It'll be fine.... absolutely fine.

Probably.

Fit Mark is a genius!

2010-11-22T20:28:00.003Z

Not only a genius, but a generous genius, having sponsored me for the Santa Jog purely on the basis that the Santa Suit photo was worth it...

I emailed Fit Mark yesterday to say that I seemed to be running slower than ever - I thought I'd done 3.5k but apparently SLOWER than when I was completely rubbish at the running bit of the triathlon, which was 5k, and which I walked a lot of. Am I going backwards? Weird... Anyway, Fit Mark very kindly emailed me back to say that, yes, I would be running much slower on hills and slippery tracks, and he'd also (this is the genius bit) used Google Earth to work out where I'd actually been was 4.5k. That's NEARLY 5K. Woo Hoo!!! That means I should be able to do the Santa 5k without too many problems. Apart from the oversized Santa suit... Perhaps I should go out for a training run in the full outfit? That would give the drivers on the main road something to talk about when they got home!

So BIG THANKS to Fit Mark for being encouraging and useful and generally a genius - what a star!